Yup. Senator Graham was trying to reassure folks in the Middle East that Congress would continue to play a primary role in foreign policy, “regardless of what Mr. Trump says or does.”
“The Congress is going to be around no matter who is president,” Graham told reporters after meeting with Egyptian President Abdel-Fatah el-Sissi as part of a Republican congressional delegation touring the Middle East.
“All of us, regardless of what Mr. Trump says or does, we are going to keep being who we are, so don’t let the political scenes at home get you too upset,” Graham said.
I found this a long time ago. I’m sure it was through Google. And the attribution is right there on the left. Or his right. Lindsey’s that is.
I feel sooooooooo much better knowing that Trump is the leading candidate to have his finger near the button. Because Congress will be there, doing the very same shit they have done to screw up the country for decades.
Nothing to see here, folks, move along.
Personally, I would have been more reassured if Senator Graham had gone to Middle Earth and spoken about Orcs.
When he was a young man, Ted Cruz, aspired to “make ‘tit’ films” and sought “World Domination, you know rule everything.” Today he is a top contender for the GOP Presidential nomination.
Quick! Will somebody please get this guy a job in porno so we can get him out of politics?
When you move to another country where you don’t speak the language, you expect things to be challenging. But I think that there are scientific studies that estimate that the odds of your expectations equaling reality is precisely 5,392,487 to 1.
When we moved to Geneva in 1997, we, like all other expats, knew that there would be culture shock. We didn’t speak the language. We didn’t know our way around. We were babes in the woods and there were wild boar in them thar hills. Oh, and in those woods.
In fact, we hadn’t been in Switzerland long before John came down with a cold. NBD, right? Off to the pharmacy we went.
But of course, we couldn’t speak the language, which made it a bit of a challenge.
Nevertheless, I took my responsibility as family french speaker seriously. I went to the pharmacy with my husband with my English-French/French-English dictionary in hand.
My husband has a cold (mon mari a un rhume). He has a stuffy nose (il a un nez bouché). Sadly, my french was not really good. And I learned again that day that if you are foolish enough to speak to a french speaker in French, the asshole will respond to you in french! WTF?????? Why do they DO that?
Anyway, in pidgeon french, I told the pharmacist that we wanted a decongestant. And really, it didn’t seem like such a big deal.
“Vous avez besoin d’un lavage de nez,” said the pharmacist.
John and I looked at each other.
“She’s recommending a nose washer,” I said. “I guess that makes sense. I guess a decongestant will “wash you nose.”
We were handed a box and the pharmacist allowed us to open it to look at the instructions. The illustrated instructions. Color illustrations. of a man leaning over the sink with a ‘lavage de nez’ in one nostril and a stream of green snot pouring out of the other.
I am not just using this picture because my husband is a big baby when he gets sick. Really. Google Image
Ewwww.
Upon our return to the US, we learned that netti pots had become popular remedies for stuffy noses.
Ewwww.
They also spread infection because they are difficult to clean. And then there is the goo that goes into the sink….
Ewwww.
Tonight while spending money I don’t have on gifts for folks, I saw a commercial for a Navage.
So I needed to share my story. Because that’s what we bloggers do.
Ewwww.
I just felt it necessary to prove that I don’t only think about poop when I think about weird medical treatments.
But of course, everything I discuss would interest any 12 year old. Like me.
Recently, a close friend/relative was diagnosed with a chronic disease. He’s pretty miserable.
It’s a hard thing to accept, that diagnosis. To find out that you have something nasty that you don’t want, and it’ll always be with you. Gee Willikers, who the hell do you thank for that?
Still, having had a chronic disease for forty years, I’ve learned a thing or two that I can pass along.
I’ve learned that basically, it’s a frog’s life. Yup. A while ago I figured out that living life with a chronic disease simply means you’re a frog.
You don’t look like a frog!
You see, most of the time, life is normal. You hang out in the pond with your family and friends. You eat bugs which is gross, of course. But still, life is good most of the time.
This pond has an all you can eat buffet!
But naturally, life isn’t quite that easy. It isn’t quite that easy if you don’t have health problems. But if you do, well, you have to pay attention to what happens to you. The Devil is in the details. Actually, the devil is in the damn symptoms you probably think aren’t worth bothering with.
You have to watch out for pot. Pots. You have to watch out for pots.
Huh?
Oh surely you’ve heard about frogs and pots!
No? Let me rekindle that image.
Rumor has it* that sometimes someone (an asshole no doubt) puts a poor, unsuspecting frog into a pot of boiling water. The frog (being smarter than the average bear) immediately jumps out. Of course s/he does! It’s painful! If s/he doesn’t, well, we won’t need to worry about that frog’s gender much longer.
Shit! THAT HURTS!
Sometimes with a chronic illness, you get really sick. It’s dramatic, debilitating. It sucks. And generally, the reaction is to JUMP!
Jump! To the phone to call the doctor. Jump! To call the nurse. Jump! To call my husband. Jump! To scream to heaven for my mother (because, in spite of the fact that she is in another realm, when something hurts, I want Mooooooooooooooom!). Jump! To call my sympathetic friends.
Hell, I’ll call whoever will come and help me. Because the water in that pot is too damn hot; I must react. Whatever it takes. I then follow the advice I’m given, and feel better. Much better.
Sadly, it’s not always easy being green. Or having a chronic disease.
You see, sometimes, the frog ends up in a pot of cool, refreshing water. And then, dammit, that same asshole turns on the heat. The results ain’t pretty.
Shit
Twice in the past few years, I’ve found myself hanging out in that stupid damn pot after someone turned on the gas (sometimes literally). In retrospect, it seems idiotic of me.. Me! The expert patient, with 40 years of practice! It seems so obvious. But day to day, really, it is not at all clear that the water I’m in has heated up so much that, well, getting out just doesn’t seem worth the effort.
Because, you see, when you have a chronic illness, there are little things that creep up, little pains that are really nothing. Nothing at all. Certainly nothing to complain about. Nothing to worry about. Nothing to mention to that person on the other side of the bed.
Just as surely, it’s nothing worth calling the doctor about. Nothing even worth remembering during those routine visits. Nope, it’s all good.
But then suddenly, unexpectedly, you realize that that little ache, that pain that started off so mild, that has stayed with you and built up. Day by day. Suddenly it becomes unbearable.
So, I thought of what advice I should give to my poor depressed friend.
Pay attention to your symptoms. If you have an acute problem, jump out of the pot. Call your doctor. Duh!
Pay attention to your symptoms. If something little seems hardly worth mentioning – JUMP ANYWAY!!! JUMP OUT OF THE DAMN POT!
More specifically, call your doctor. Let him or her know what is happening. SQUEAK! I know that’s what mice do, but I’m sure frogs squeak too,when they have to, too. It may be nothing, in fact, it probably is. But mention it anyway. And if it is something, there may be help closer to hand than you think.
The two times I stayed in the pot?
The first time I didn’t want to go on a medicine my doctor thought would help me; I read too much. The day after my first dose of that medication I was nearly pain free. Gradually, I had been barely able to walk, sit or stand. I have a good doctor but I didn’t want to follow her advice.
The second time, I was somewhat less stupid. I was away, and developed a painful skin condition, that started up slowly. It was no big deal. NBD at all. Until, after a couple of weeks, it was. When I talked to my doctor, she made a simple recommendation. I followed it and the pain went away.
I’ve lived with Crohn’s for 40+ years. And you know what I’ve learned? Find a good doctor, and listen to him or her. Then just float along as best you can.
Because except for eating bugs, a frog’s life is pretty damn good.
* When I was looking this up on my bible, Wikipedia, I learned that this whole “frog in the pot” thing may not be precisely true. It may not be that a frog will just hang out until it dies while the water heats up. Fuck you Wikipedia. Way to ruin a good metaphor. Go eat bugs, Wikipedia.
All images are from Google. I leap in your general direction, Google images!
FiftyFourandAHalf 