Category Archives: Duncan

Doggie Bags

Today is Duncan’s birthday — his 3rd!  He is a wonderful dog.  Sweet, relatively obedient, and incredibly lovable.

Duncan Easter 2 2017

The Birthday Boy!

But I went a bit overboard with doggie treats for this good boy this year.  So I figured I’d share them with his friends at the park.  In a way that would be good for the earth.  In a way that positively shouts “DOG!” I made doggie goodie bags!

Goodie Bags

OK, in the stupidest way possible.  I used biodegradable dog poop bags, and filled them full of delicious brown dog treats.  That way, if I missed any of the morning friends Duncan and I usually walk with, I could leave one on their car.

A dog poop bag filled with brown stuff, left on a car.  What could possibly go wrong?

Luckily for me, we saw his friends, and they and their parents were delighted by the goodie bags.  They didn’t think me weird for

  1. Making doggie goodie bags,
  2. Using poop bags for party bags; or
  3. Expecting that if they found one of these on their car that they would open it up and feed it to their dog.

 

 

 

 

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Filed under 2017, A Little Restraint, Perhaps, Bat-shit crazy, Birthday, Class Act, Conspicuous consumption, Cool people, Dogs, Duncan, Family, Good Deed Doers, Holy Shit, Humor, Oh shit, Oops!, Poop, Poop Power, Stupidity, Why the hell do I tell you these stories?, Wild Beasts, WTF?

The Beast

Lemme get this straight.

duncan-christmas-2016

Photo Credit:  Jacob

A big fat guy in a red suit

will come down the chimney,

And I’m Supposed to Let Him In?

HO, HO, HO!

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Filed under Bat-shit crazy, Crazy family members, Criminal Activity, Dogs, Duncan, Good Works, Holidays, Huh?, Humor, Love, Oh shit, Peace, Wild Beasts

Rights?!? WTF is Wrong With Us?

Look into the eyes of a terrorist.  A threat to your safety and mine.  Something should be done about her.  Ammirite? 

macie

Macie.  Photo from owner Susan R. Smith, courtesy of the Loudoun Times.

Oh wait!  Something was done about her!  I feel safer already.

Virginia, where I live, is an “Open Carry” state.  Where folks can pack their pistols and take them with them no matter where they go.

  • To the grocery store (always a terrifying experience — what if they bruise my apples?).
  • To a bar (because, really, what could possibly go wrong?)
  • When taking a leisurely stroll in the park.

Maybe your state is among them!  Wouldn’t that be great?

open-carry-map

Photo from the Law Center to Prevent Gun Violence, courtesy of the Wall Street Journal.  And Google, natch.

Now what connection could that picture and that map possibly have?

Well, guess what happened on Tuesday?  Just guess.

Macie, an 11 month old lab mix was running in a park on a beautiful day.  Her crimes were many.  Serious.

  • She was off the leash
  • She was friendly
  • She did not respond immediately to her owners call

So naturally she deserved to be shot.  Oh, and killed.

I guess I should back up a bit.

Macie was running off-leash in a park where she wasn’t supposed to be off-leash but where everybody lets their dog run off leash.

Smith said her dog approached the couple and jumped in the air. She said the dog was leaping behind the man but was not barking at the time.

At that point, the man yelled out, “Call your dog,” Smith said. “He said it once, maybe twice.”

Smith said she and her friend then started running toward the dogs, who were about 20 yards away.

“We called for our dogs,” Smith said. Then she said she saw the man’s arm “go to his side” and across his body. “He sees us coming,” she said. The man pulled out a gun and fired it at the dog.

The man faces no charges.  He was legally carrying a gun and reportedly “fired in self-defense.”  But really, there was no threat.  The owner was coming for the dog.  She was a fucking puppy saying hello.

Sources:  The Washington Post, The Loudoun Times

*****

This story has me pretty upset.  Because I walk Duncan not too far from the scene of Marcie’s killing.  Duncan is often off-leash, too.  Because it is a beautiful place to let him run.  There aren’t many places where off-leash is permitted around here.  Those places that exist are small fenced in dog parks that reek of pee.

Duncan is quite good at coming when I call him — he always gets a treat.  But he’s friendly, and I have to (and do) restrain him when I see an unfamiliar walker or jogger coming towards him.  He loves to say hello.

riverbend-path

Duncan and I walk here most days.  Not far from where Macie died.

To me, this man is a perfect example of exactly the problem with folks carrying around guns.  They use them.  Stupidly.  And without consequence. 

Common sense and restraint don’t enter into the picture.

We need to do something about our society where folks feel the need to carry a gun, and feel entitled to use it.

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Filed under 'Merica, A Little Restraint, Perhaps, All The News You Need, Ammosexuals, Beating that Dead Horse, Being an asshole, Cancer on Society, Cowardly Gun Owners, Crime and Punishment, Criminal Activity, Disgustology, Don't Make Me Puke, Duncan, Elections Matter, Gun control, How the Hell Did We GET HERE?, Huh?, Humor, Justice, Oh shit, Taking Care of Each Other, What a Putz, WTF?

National Dog Day

 

Even though every day at my house is Dog Day, I figured I hadn’t posted a picture of Duncan in a while.   Here he is, the Devil!

Duncs in Maine 7-16 2

Damn!  You caught me looking at the camera!!!

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Filed under 'Merica, All The News You Need, Bat-shit crazy, Crazy family members, Dogs, Duncan, Humor, Love, Mental Health, Oh shit, Pooders, Poop, Taking Care of Each Other

You See, I DO Appreciate Art and Shit! 💩

With an artist brother and a sister-in-law, you’d think I’d be more involved in the art world. Sadly, I’m not.

I used to be more of a gallery girl, loved nothing more than spending time in any one of the wonderful museums and galleries near where I lived or worked.  And the galleries I got to visit while living in or traveling to Europe could fill a book.  Still, going to a museum with either Fred or my sister-in-law, with someone who knows a lot about art, well, it is a wonderful treat.

But with my Crohn’s disease as active as it is these days, I don’t go very often.

For anybody without access to art, though, I recommend following my blogging buddy Mark, of Exile on Pain Street .  He works in NYC and frequents museums, galleries and auctions and frequently writes about it on his blog.  Mark does it with wit and without the snobbishness that usually accompanies folks who talk about art.

But nobody posts about art quite like I do.  Or about art theft, because that’s really what this post is all about.  Art theft pure and simple.

How-to-Steal-a-Million-5

Audrey Hepburn and Peter O’Toole in How to Steal A Million (Google Image)

The international art heist I’m talking about occurred in Spain, just outside Madrid.  I’m pretty sure it involved neither Audrey nor Peter.  Nor, probably, would the stolen object ever find its way into the Louvre.

Still, if you know anything about art, the beauty of an object is all in the eye of the beholder.  It may also be dependent on the species.  Or on the leash holder.

Torrelodones, a town near Madrid, paid 2,400 euros ($2,726; £1,885) for this sculpture:

Spanish Dog poop sculpture

Yes, it is a giant, inflatable pile of dog poo.  Photo from BBC (although they might deny it)

The article I read says:

The three-metre high inflatable bought as part of a campaign to encourage pet-lovers to pick up after their dogs went missing, El Pais newspaper reports. The bizarre inflatable disappeared after it had been packed away in its carry-case and the police are now on the trail of the 30 kilogramme dog poop, town officials say.

Speaking to the ABC newspaper, town councillor Angel Guirao said staff were shocked and perplexed by the theft, and a replacement excrement was already on order because “we know that the campaign has been a great success”.

I wish they’d asked me.  I could have provided plenty of models for this piece of art.

Why are you picking on me.png

Why are you picking on me.  Google, eat your heart out cause I took this one!

Don’t hesitate to ask me anything about art.  Or poop.

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Filed under Bat-shit crazy, Being an asshole, Conspicuous consumption, Crohn's Disease, Curses!, Dogs, Duncan, Huh?, Humor, Not something you hear about every day, Oh shit, Peter O'Toole, Political Corruption, Poop, Seriously funny, Seriously weird, Shit, Shit happens, Size Matters, Stealing, Stupid things happen in other countries too! Who knew!, Stupidity, Useful thing to do with poop, What a Maroon, Wild Beasts, WTF?

The Birthday Boy

I’ve been explaining to Duncan for weeks, that starting today, April 27, 2016, he is a grownup dog.  That means no more stealing shoes (always mine), no more stealing socks (usually Jacobs and always dirty), and no more poop eating.

Because today is Duncan’s 2nd Birthday.

Oh GROW UPPPPPPPP, Duncan!

The Sock Monster

Duncan in Jacob’s Man Cave

So far today, he stole my boot, lunged for a pile of horse poop — Mom was too fast for you today! — and stole a clean sock from the basket as I took a load of laundry out of the dryer.  Dogs are gross.

Perhaps I should speak to him in French?

 

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Filed under Adult Traumas, Birthday, Crazy family members, Disgustology, Dogs, Don't Make Me Puke, Duncan, Huh?, Humor, Oh shit, Poop, Shit, Shit happens, Wild Beasts, WTF?

A Phila — A Philan — A Good Deed Doer

A week or two back, on Gibber Jabber, I responded to a question (because that’s what happens over at Gibber Jabber, she asks questions and you answer them.)  I said that my dream job would be to be a philanthropist.  A good deed doer.

They're called ... (Google, natch)

They’re called … phila — philan — “Good Deed Doers” (Google, natch)

 

And of course, if I could, I would give the world a whole lot of good stuff.

But this week I’ve found myself to be the benefactor of a good deed doer!  Yup, Me!

A very generous, very wealthy man gave me, John and mostly Duncan a lovely hunk of land in Maine on Mount Dessert Island where we are right now.

For many years, we’ve been coming to this island with our various dogs.  Acadia National Park takes up much of the island, and it is an amazingly beautiful place to hike or just sit and watch the sea from a pink mountaintop.  Acadia is magical.

But there are leash laws in Acadia, as it is a National Park.  And while we haven’t always been strict adherents to that particular rule, well, the park is full of people, some of whom don’t really want to meet my dogs (imagine!).

Last year, we found out about Little Long Pond. It is a family preserve, owned by the Rockefellers, with hiking trails, carriage roads and a lovely, well, long pond.  Dogs were allowed to run free there.  In all 1,000 acres of the place.

Little Long Pond Boat house

And this month, David Rockefeller celebrated his 100th birthday by giving this piece of land to Duncan!  Well, and me.  And John.  And you!

FREEDOM!

FREEDOM!

To celebrate his 100th birthday, he donated the land which abuts Acadia National Park (much of which his family had also donated) to the nonprofit Land and Garden Preserve, so that they will keep and preserve it AND CONTINUE TO LET DOGS RUN FREE!

Thank you, Mr. Rockefeller!

Thank you, Mr. Rockefeller!

Thanks, Mr. Rockefeller.  We wish you many happy returns.  We know we will have many happy returns to Little Long Pond; and we will think of you and thank you each time we do.

*     *     *

 I am not a particularly good photographer, but I have a camera shy dog.

 

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Filed under All The News You Need, All We Are Saying Is Give Peace A Chance, Dogs, Duncan, Good Deed Doers, Health, Holidays, Humor, Maine, Pets, Taking Care of Each Other