Category Archives: Disgustology

November 14, 2013 · 0:00

How I’ll Make My Millions!

Nobody has ever accused me of being on the cutting edge of anything.  But I must say that I have missed some golden opportunities.  In fact, when I first hear about new things, I generally think that whatever it is is stupid.  It’s a trend that began years ago.   If I had invested in some of these things when I first heard of them, well, I wouldn’t be wasting my time blogging — I would be paying someone to write my blog for me.  I’d be that rich.

It was about 1979 when my then-roommate Elizabeth announced her brilliant idea.

“What if they made Coke without caffeine?” she said to me one night after she decided not to have a Coke because she was tired and it would keep her up.

“What would be the point of that?” I responded, no doubt looking at her like she was stupid.

Caffeine-free Coke

OK, so I was wrong.

At the time, Elizabeth was considering going to business school for an MBA.  She would today be a brilliant executive at a Fortune 500 company if only I had been more encouraging.  Instead, she went to medical school and became a psychiatrist.

When CNN first came on, I thought

“Who needs news 24 hours a day?”

CNN

Strike 2

When C-Span began showing House and Senate floor debate, while I was actually working as a lobbyist, well, I couldn’t believe it.

“Who is going to watch that unless they get paid to?  It is sooooooooooooooooo boring!” 

I STILL think I was right about this one.

I STILL think I was right about this one.

I never had a Walkman.

“I want to listen to the birds when I’m out walking!”

I thought iPods were stupid and besides I could never figure out iTunes.  I still get emails from them and they still haven’t figured out that I hate disco.

Smart phones?  “How stupid.”

But I decided that it is time to capitalize on my knack for thinking huge money makers are stupid.  In fact, I’ve suggested to John that we should invest our retirement savings in the next product I think is completely inane.  It’ll be an uphill battle, though.  He doesn’t trust my investment instincts since I started investing in 72 packs of toilet paper.

But I’m going to see if he’ll go along with me on this invention.  Because I have to admit, it is possibly the stupidest thing I have ever heard of.  We’ll make a bloody fortune.

If I were to wear anti-rape underpants, something would absolutely get into my pants.  But I’m quite sure it wouldn’t be a rapist.  And it wouldn’t come from outside, either.

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My thanks to Karen at Do Not Get Sick in the Sink for her post on this.

And my thanks to Google, without which my posts would be far less colorful.

47 Comments

Filed under Bloggin' Buddies, Crohn's Disease, Disgustology, Family, Gizmos, Huh?, Humor, Stupidity

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November 7, 2013 · 0:00

Sore Loser

There is a time honored tradition in our democracy that has the losing side contacting the winning side to offer congratulations.  It is part of how we as a society put the disagreements between candidates behind and go forth and govern.

Obviously, as a Democrat, I am happy with the results in the Governor’s race (and the Lt. Governor’s race).  I am hopeful about the close election here for Attorney General, which is still being counted.

But as someone who believes in governing as much as I believe in democracy, well, I am disgusted with the tone of Ken Cuccinelli’s post-defeat actions.  He has no plans to contact Governor-elect McAuliffe.  He has no plans to get together to see what can be done to help the people of the Commonwealth.

Ken Cuccinelli’s Concession speech, if you have the stomach for it, wasn’t a concession speech.  It was a “We have to be even bigger assholes and THEN we’ll win” speech.  It is scary to think that these fanatics still claim a loss as a victory, and have no plan to work within the confines of what — and whom — the voters chose.

What an ass.  What a dangerous ass.

I wonder if when Ken Cuccinelli goes and fucks himself, if it is considered sodomy.

As I say all the time, Elections Matter.  Good for Virginia.

"Thus, Always, to Tyrants." Virginia Got that Right (Google image)

“Thus, Always, to Tyrants.”
Virginia Got that Right
(Google image)

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For those of you who don’t peruse the comments, I had to put this hilarious one from El Guapo into the post:

Not sure about the sodomy, but if Cuccinelli tried to mind-fuck himself, it would probably be necrophilia.

 

55 Comments

Filed under Campaigning, Disgustology, GOP Government Shutdown, History, Huh?, Hypocrisy, Law, Politics, Stupidity, Taking Care of Each Other, Virginia, Voting

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October 13, 2013 · 0:00

One Picture

You know that old adage “One Picture is Worth A Thousand Words”?

Sometimes, one picture really is all you need.

 

Photo Courtesy of Joan Walsh, via CrooksandLiars.com

Photo Courtesy of Joan Walsh, via CrooksandLiars.com

 

I’m sure it’s just a coincidence that a black family resides in the White House.  Positive.

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Filed under Campaigning, Criminal Activity, Disgustology, Elections, GOP Government Shutdown, History, Huh?, Hypocrisy, Stupidity, Voting

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October 5, 2013 · 0:00

Saving Face

When John F. Kennedy won the standoff with the Soviets during the Cuban Missile Crisis in 1962, there was more to the story.

You see, we didn’t win completely.  Nope. Kennedy gave something up, too.

It’s true.  Kennedy got the Soviets to pull the missiles out of Cuba, but he also let them save face.  A month or so later, the U.S. pulled out some of our missiles, based in Turkey that were pointed at the USSR.  So the Ruskies won something too.

That’s how negotiations work.  Everybody gets a little something.  Because it’s all about respect.  Truly.  Winning?  Losing?  They don’t matter.  But respect, that’s everything.

And you know, in all fairness, we do need to do that with the GOP’s Government Shutdown.  Because, as so eloquently stated by Rep. Marlin Stutzman (R-IN) about the GOP (who were almost immediately — and accurately — blamed and ridiculed for closing down the government):

“We’re not going to be disrespected, We have to get something out of this. And I don’t know what that even is.”

But what to give them? 

Here’s the suggestion of what they should get by Laurence Lewis in a post on The Daily Kos:

Photo Credit: Daily Kos

Photo Credit: Unknown but I got it from the Daily Kos

 

Yup.  That’s more than they deserve. 

And besides, John Boehner can use it as a hanky if he doesn’t want to wear it.

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Filed under Conspicuous consumption, Criminal Activity, Daily Kos, Disgustology, Elections, GOP Government Shutdown, History, Humor, Politics, Stupidity, Taking Care of Each Other, Wild Beasts

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October 4, 2013 · 0:00

Left vs. Right — You Choose

In the left corner, representing us, we have a true statesperson:  Senator Elizabeth Warner:

When was the last time the anarchy gang called for regulators to go easier on companies that put lead in children’s toys? Or for inspectors to stop checking whether the meat in our grocery stores is crawling with deadly bacteria? Or for the FDA to ignore whether morning sickness drugs will cause horrible deformities in our babies?

When? Never. In fact, whenever the anarchists make any headway in their quest and cause damage to our government, the opposite happens.

    …

Why do they do this? Because the boogeyman government in the alternate universe of their fiery political speeches isn’t real. It doesn’t exist.

 Government is real, and it has three basic functions:
1.    Provide for the national defense.
2.    Put rules in place rules, like traffic lights and bank regulations, that are fair and transparent.
3.    Build the things together that none of us can build alone – roads, schools, power grids – the things that give everyone a chance to succeed.

    …

 We are alive, we are healthier, we are stronger because of government.

And in the other corner, we have John Boehner and the Tea Party Tizziers:

Elections Matter!

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My thanks to the Stephen D at the Daily Kos for the video link to Senator Warren (my hero).

And my thanks to one of my favorite blogging buddies, Frank of A Frank Angle for Groucho.

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Filed under Bloggin' Buddies, Campaigning, Climate Change, Criminal Activity, Disgustology, Elections, Global Warming, Gun control, Health and Medicine, History, Huh?, Humor, Hypocrisy, Law, Mental Health, Politics, Stupidity, Taking Care of Each Other, Voting, Wild Beasts

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