Category Archives: Missing Folks

September 25, 2023 · 0:00

AWOL

Crap.

I owe you an explanation.  You, who may vaguely remember me.  It’s been a while.

In fact, I’ve been working on my explanation for ages.  Because I disappeared.  Vanished from the ‘sphere.  Went blogger-AWOL.

But honestly, I get bummed out every time I start telling you what happened.  That is poison for a humor blogger and storyteller.

So I haven’t told the story here.  I hope this time is a bit different.  That I can tell the story.  That I can get it out, so the Ziggy cloud over my head becomes more identifiable.  More understandable. Well, I am going to try.

You see, I lost my straight man.  My partner.  My best friend. My personal Google.  My husband, John.

And can I just tell you that I’m pissed?  I was supposed to die first.  After all, if you remember me, I’ve been sick all my life.  Since I was about 15!  I’m not going to set any longevity records.

John?  Healthy as a horse.  Ate well, exercised, timed himself brushing his teeth.  Until he wasn’t.  Suddenly, in the spring/summer of 2019, John was diagnosed with cancer.  And not one of the good kinds (as if there are any good cancers).  A cancer with poor treatment options and poorer outcomes.

Pancreatic cancer is evil.  And relatively quick.

So my wonderful husband passed away last summer.

https://www.legacy.com/us/obituaries/washingtonpost/name/john-kingery-obituary?id=36024672

Jacob and I held a wonderful send-off for him last fall.  We held it at a favorite Pizza/Brew Pub, with music provided by a Scottish duo – bagpipes, fiddles, guitar.  A great group of folks came from all over the country and even from Europe:  family, friends of ours from all times of our lives, colleagues.  It was a party that even my introverted husband would have loved.  I wish he’d been there in more than just spirit.

Jacob and I spread John’s ashes in the Cove in Maine.

That night we looked out over the Cove shimmering in the moonlight.

“I can just see your dad kayaking out there,” I said to Jacob.

“Mom,” responded Jacob, “I’m pretty sure he’s body surfing.”

63 Comments

Filed under Adult Traumas, All The News You Need, Cancer, Death, Health, Holy Shit, Illness, Missing Folks, Oh shit, Sad News, Shit, Shit happens

Tagged as ,

August 14, 2018 · 0:00

Take the Long Way Home

Some things never change.

“That boy was NEVER where he was supposed to be!” That was Mom’s mantra whenever telling her favorite stories of our childhood.  Invariably they involved Bob. (It sucks to be a late entry into a big family.)

“People talk about the ‘terrible twos!” she’d say.  “Well Bob was “a terrible two” for five years!”

Everybody agreed that Bob was quite a handful.

If you believe the stories, even before he could walk, Bob could escape:

  • His crib
  • His room
  • The house

He would leave the house, and appear at local businesses in his jammies.  He went to the local bakery where he was given donuts, at the local restaurants where he was given pancakes, and at the homes of relatives who lived in the neighborhood.  Usually before they had started their day.  He was a friendly little tike.  Or else he was hungry.

“I’m sure the whole neighborhood thought I was starving that kid!” Mom laughed. “I was mortified, and terrified that somebody would call the police on me for neglecting my son.”

Well, somethings never change.

Bob, after his death, escaped. And it cracked me up.

Bob was supposed to be sent to one funeral home, but he was sent to a different one.  It took nearly 24 hours to get him to the correct place.

I love the idea that Bob wandered around town, one last time.  I hope someone gave him a donut.

Some things never change.

26 Comments

Filed under 2018, ; Don't Make Me Feel Perky Tonigh, A Little Restraint, Perhaps, Brothers, Cool people, Crazy family members, Family, Hanky Alert, Holy Shit, Humor, laughter, Missing Folks, Mom Stories, Oh shit, Sad News, Seriously funny, Shit happens, Taking Care of Each Other

July 31, 2017 · 0:00

100

“Who’s thaaaat?” I asked with my three-year old heart filling with love.

She laughed.

“That’s your father when he was in the Navy!”

“Wow.”

I sat and stared at that picture for the longest time.

My dad was an incredibly handsome man, and I adored him.  I still do.  And he is still the handsomest man I’ve ever known.

Today would have been his 100th Birthday.

mr-whiskers

Dad loved this picture.  Mr. Whiskers.  1917-2000

30 Comments

Filed under 1917, 2017, Cool people, Crazy family members, Dad, Family, Father-Daughter Relationships, Good Deed Doers, Growing up, Humor, laughter, Love, Missing Folks, Normandy, Taking Care of Each Other, Thanks again

Tagged as , , , ,

April 22, 2017 · 0:00

Earth Day / Science / Judy

Earth Day.  The Science March (which I sadly can’t attend until Science gets around to curing my damn Crohn’s Disease).  My late sister Judy’s birthday.  So I’m reposting this.  Hey – Jude believed firmly in recycling!

***

She’s been gone now for 17 years, Jude.  Not a day has gone by since that I haven’t wanted to talk with her, laugh with her, or, alternatively because she was my sister, smack her.  There really isn’t a relationship like you have with a sister.  Even long after they are gone.

*****

Today, April 22, is Earth Day!  It’s the Anniversary of the very first Earth Day.  Here  is Walter Cronkite’s report on the first Earth Day, 1970:

It would also be my late sister Judy’s 65th birthday.

Whoever made the decision to turn Judy’s birthday into Earth Day chose wisely.  Judy was a born environmentalist and recycler.

On the first Earth Day, Judy was a new, very young mother who believed in saving the planet.  She was the first “environmentalist” I ever knew personally, and well, I thought she was nuts.  There was a recycling bin in her kitchen for as long as I can remember.  And this was back when recycling took effort.  She believed in gardens, not garbage, and she made life bloom wherever she was.

“I’ve got kids,” she’d say.  “It’s their planet too!”  

But years later, Judy took recycling to a whole different level when she helped people recycle themselves.  In the 1990s, Jude, who was then living in Florida, began working with the Homeless, assisting at shelters.   Then she actively began trying to help homeless vets food, shelter and work — to enable them to jump-start their lives.

When she died in early 2000, the American Legion awarded her honorary membership for her services to homeless vets.  A homeless shelter was named in her  honor.  So she’s still doing good works, my sister is.  That would make her wildly happy.

Jude also gave me the Beatles.  So it is very appropriate that they wrote a song for her.

You see, the night the Beatles were on Ed Sullivan, it was MY turn to choose what we were going to watch.  And we were going to watch the second part of The Scarecrow of Romney Marsh starring Patrick McGoohan on the Wonderful Wide World of Disney.  My four (all older and MUCH cooler) siblings were furious with me.  But I was quite insistent.  You might even say that I threw a Class I temper tantrum over it, but I wouldn’t admit to that.  Hey, I was seven.  And it was my turn to choose.  Fair is fair, especially in a big family with only one TV.

Somehow, Judy talked me out of my turn.  She was always very persuasive.  Thanks Jude.

Hey Jude, Happy Earth Day-Birthday.

28 Comments

Filed under Adult Traumas, All The News You Need, All We Are Saying Is Give Peace A Chance, Anniversary, Birthday, Childhood Traumas, Climate Change, Cool people, Crazy family members, Crohn's Disease, Do GOP Voters Actually THINK?, Elections Matter, Family, Farts, GET VACCINATED, Global Warming, Good Deed Doers, Good Works, Hey Jude, Holidays, How the Hell Did We GET HERE?, Humor, Judy, Mental Health, Missing Folks, My Right to Protest, Not My President, Peaceful Protests, Plagarizing myself, Role Models, Saving the World, Science, Shitty GOP, Sisters, Taking Care of Each Other, Trump is a Putz, Vaccines, Women Should Decide Women's Health Issues

Tagged as , , , , , , , , ,

January 25, 2017 · 0:00

Cut It Out, 2017

Dear 2017,

Cut it out — right now.  Just stop being an asshole.  You’re far too young.

We already have to deal with Donald Trump sullying the Oval Office.

We already see our rights, our civil liberties, our healthcare, Medicare, Social Security, all flushed down the toilet.  [No.  I’m not going to illustrate a flushing toilet.  What do you take me for?]

But you’re off to a bad start otherwise, too.

Stop taking people.  Or stop taking good people.You need to take someone?  I have some suggestions.  Call me, 2017, so the U.S. Secret Service doesn’t.

But Mary?  You took Mary?  You left Trump and took Mary?

Jeez, 2017.  Cut. It. Out.

35 Comments

Filed under 'Merica, 2017, A Little Restraint, Perhaps, Adult Traumas, All The News You Need, Being an asshole, Cancer on Society, Class Act, Clusterfuck, Curses!, Cut it out, 2017!, Donald Trump, Hands off My Medicare, How the Hell Did We GET HERE?, Huh?, Humor, Just Do It and I'll Shut Up!, Mary Tyler Moore, Missing Folks, Negotiating, Not My President, Oh shit, Passive Aggression, Role Models, Sad News, Shit, Stop!, WTF?

Tagged as , , ,