Category Archives: Campaigning

Need a New Job? I Got One For You!

Need a new job?  A new career path?

Are you stuck in a dead end job?  No future?  No expansion?  No ability to grow, to expand?

Well there is a whole new field that is just opening up.  And the possibilities for advancement are endless.  It’s a growth area, especially here in the Washington, DC area.

Best of all, you can do it from home.  Even while you keep your current job.

You can do it anywhere.

Yes, you too can become a “Disgustologist!”

Dr. Valerie Curtis is an anthropologist who studies yucky stuff:  poo, vomit, maggots, rotting flesh.  You know, the stuff that smells bad, hurts us or causes disease.  Stuff that we avoid.  This avoidance helps keep us healthy – and keeping away from disease-ridden filth is always a plus.

So in reading this article about Dr. Curtis, I saw a potential growth opportunity festering right there in front of me.

You and me will use the science of “Disgustology” to lead American voters back into voting for sensible politicians.  And into voting out the disgusting ones.

Now, I know many of you are saying,

“But Elyse, American voters have proven since they re-elected George W Bush that they are disgusting!”

And you do have a point.

“But Elyse, American voters have voted in members of the Tea Party!”

And you have another point.

“But Elyse, American voters have voted for people who are destroying our humanity.”

OK, you have lots of points.

That’s where we Disgustologists come in.  Plus that’s why Disgustology is such a growth industry.  Because we are going to reinsert the “That’s Disgusting!” reflex back into the American voter.   With pictures!

Now it’s hard to know where to start these days, isn’t it.  So I started randomly, with my faint recollection that we Americans have hearts and a collective heart.

You know how we Americans like to stick together.  How we’re always the first to help each other in times of tragedy.  How we pull together and support each other during natural disasters?  We pride ourselves on that.

So — Disgustologists – Get your feet wet with this bit of hypocrisy:

Four GOP Congressmen voted FOR Colorado Flood Relief AFTER voting AGAINST Hurricane Sandy Relief!

Here they are:

Rep Cory Gardner (R-CO)

Rep Cory Gardner (R-CO)

Rep Mike Coffman (R-CO)

Rep Mike Coffman (R-CO)

Rep Scott Tipton

Rep Scott Tipton (R-CO)

Rep. Doug Lamborn (R-CO)

Rep. Doug Lamborn (R-CO)

Now don’t get me wrong — I think we as Americans SHOULD take care of the flood victims in Colorado.  And New Jersey.  And victims of hurricanes.  Oh and fires.  We can’t forget the victims of fires.  In fact, we can’t — we shouldn’t — deny aid to folks that are harmed by natural disasters.  Of course we shouldn’t.  We are America.  The richest country in the world.  We take care of our own.  Right?  Right?  You there — am I right?

But you know, there are some folks that we just need to take care of more than others.  Take that good Christian, Rep. Stephen Fincher (R-TN).

Rep. Stephen Fincher (R-TN)

Rep. Stephen Fincher (R-TN)

Fincher was a proponent of separating the Farm Subsidies bill from the Food Stamp bill.  He believes that the Food Stamp program “steals other people’s money.”   He backs up his stand with the bible, natch:

“He who will not work shall not eat”

Those vile children, expecting food, an education and a future.  Stone them, I say, stone them!

But guess what!  Some of YOUR money is going to Congressman Fincher!  Yeah, really!  But, being a good, moral Christian, I’m sure he deserves it.  Look at this:

Mr. Fisher is the second most heavily subsidized “farmer” in Congress under the Farm Subsidies Bill!  Yahoo!  I love it when my money goes to keep hypocrites in business.

USDA data collected in EWG’s 2013 farm subsidy database update — going live tomorrow –shows that Fincher collected a staggering $3.48 million in “our” money from 1999 to 2012. In 2012 alone, the congressman was cut a government check for a $70,000 direct payment. Direct payments are issued automatically, regardless of need, and go predominantly to the largest, most profitable farm operations in the country.

Fincher’s $70,000 farm subsidy haul in 2012 dwarfs the average 2012 SNAP benefit in Tennessee of $1,586.40, and it is nearly double of Tennessee’s median household income. After voting to cut SNAP by more than $20 billion, Fincher joined his colleagues to support a proposal to expand crop insurance subsidies by $9 billion over the next 10 years.

Soon we can give Stevie some more!  I don’t know about you, but I’m DISGUSTED.

And then there’s the new kid on the block.  Ted.  And not the Ted of the TED Talks, either.

Senator Ted Cruz You'd think he was a Disgustologist instead of the nasty thing on the shoe

Senator Ted Cruz
You’d think he was a Disgustologist instead of the nasty thing on the shoe

This guy is one of the leaders of the movement to shut down the government rather than fund The Affordable Care Act.  “Obamacare,” a law that was passed by the United States Congress (of which he is now a member), signed by the President of the United States, and upheld by the United States Supreme Court.  Last I heard those were the only three branches of the U.S. government under the Constitution the GOP loves to wave in everyone’s face (but apparently have not read).

Of course, it isn’t only that Teddy is against it because he clearly doesn’t understand the U.S. government.  Nope, I’m guessing that Ted Cruz lives in some sort of vortex, because he doesn’t understand that the folks that voted him into office are the ones who need the Afordable Care Act.

Look-y here – folks in Ted Cruz’s state of Texas need Obamacare more than most.

Poverty in the US

Poverty in the US

rics

Diabetes map

I'm beginning to see a disgusting pattern here

I’m beginning to see a disgusting pattern here

And the folks who have the most to gain from Obamacare:

In America?  Disgusting!

In America? Disgusting!

Senator Ted Cruz is just disgusting.  Disgustologists?  Let’s show the world.

*     *     *

See what I mean when I say that Disgustology is a Growth Field?  Sign up today!  Opportunities are everywhere.

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Filed under Campaigning, Climate Change, Conspicuous consumption, Criminal Activity, Disgustology, Elections, History, Huh?, Humor, Hypocrisy, Law, Mysteries, Politics, Sandy, Taking Care of Each Other

WHOAH!!!! What happened?!?!

I admit, I’ve been doing a whole lot of this lately

 

Google Image, I'm sure

Google Image, I’m sure

 

But I was surprised how in two months during which I did almost no political posts whatsoever, that the world could have possibly gotten its knickers in a such twist.  Gone end-over-end.  Topsy Turvey.  All akimbo.

Two months ago, my company got two projects that would take us four months each to complete.  Both were due in two months.  Both got done.  I’ve been busy.

And I haven’t been paying attention.  I promise not to let that happen again.

Boy did I miss a whole lot.  I heard that they Congressman Issa cleared up that whole Benghazi thing!  And that Russia kept us out of war in Syria!  Somebody let me know if they admitted we’re doomed because of global climate change, ‘kay?

But the thing that has me most confused?

Apparently the country went from one where the GOP, the Republicans were interested in sticking things into women’s vaginas,

 

Yea, they like to do that.
(Google image)

 

Into one where it’s the proponents of the Affordable Healthcare Act

aka Obamacare — that want to do that!

Really!  Just look’ee here:

 

 

Only this time, they’re not just targeting the womenfolk.  They’re going after all the straight men, too.

 

 

Next, they’ll want to force all employees to wash their hands after using the restroom!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH (Google)

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! (Google)

 

*     *     *

 

What sort of people campaign against people getting checkups?  What sort of people promote such ignorance?  What sort of stupid questions am I asking?  Because we all know the answer:

 

The Morally Bankrupt GOP (Google Image)

The Morally Bankrupt GOP
(Google Image)

 

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Filed under Campaigning, Climate Change, Conspicuous consumption, Criminal Activity, Elections, Gizmos, Global Warming, Health and Medicine, Huh?, Humor, Hypocrisy, Law, Politics, Science, Stupidity

Changing The Name Game

A perfect weapon.  Because, after all, what’s in a name?

 

My thanks for this video, and for being the first person to encourage me to start a blog, goes to my friend and colleague Bao.

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Filed under Campaigning, Climate Change, Conspicuous consumption, Elections, Humor, Hypocrisy, Law, Pets, Sandy, Stupidity

It’s A Cookbook!

You probably don’t know this, but at one time I was a terrific cook.  And I have the books to prove it.  I’ve bought cookbooks wherever I’ve gone — I have them from all over Europe, although following the recipes in another language and using a different measuring system can be a bit of a challenge.

I even have one with recipes from Bill and Hillary Clinton and other political notables.  It’s called the Congressional Cookbook, and it came out in the late 1980s.  It has recipes from governors, congressmen and senators and their wives.   Hillary’s chicken, by the way, is awesome and easy.  She is a damn smart lady.

A small sample

A small sample

These days, I don’t cook as much as I used to.  And so my cookbooks are mostly gathering dust instead of flour.

But today I learned that in spite of the fact that I don’t cook so much any more, there will soon be another book I’ll need to add to my collection.

You see, Ann Romney has penned a Cookbook called The Romney Family Table.

Yup, You just can't get away from Ann.  Cover photo courtesy of Politico.com

Yup, You just can’t get away from Ann. Cover photo courtesy of Politico.com

 

In it, I’m sure she’ll tell us all how “To Serve the 47 Percent – a la Twilight Zone.”  Yum.

Because folks like Ann and Mitt wouldn’t want to eat with the 47 percent, now, would they?

{My thanks to The Last Of The Millenniums who first alerted me to this important news.  Well, sort of.  I think I’d sleep better not knowing about Ann’s plans for the future, but still.]

55 Comments

Filed under Campaigning, Elections, Family, Humor

Different Dominos

Last night, I was really tired and wanted to go to bed early.  But then I heard the start of a story by Rachel Maddow on Nixon, treason, and five years of needless war.  How the Vietnam war was on the verge of settlement at the end of October, 1968, and Richard Nixon scuttled those talks to get himself elected.  How he committed treason.  How he got away with it and set the precedent for Cheney and Bush to get away with lying about Iraq.  How it set the precedence for so many terrible things that have faced our country since 1968.

I wish I was making this up.  I wish Richard Nixon had stayed in California.  Because the world would be a very different place if there had never been a President Nixon.

http://www.nbcnews.com/id/26315908/#51234332

This is incredibly disturbing.

Here’s the transcript (Sorry, it’s rough.)

>> Thank you at home for joining us. we start with some jaw-dropping information about American politics that has been reported out by a British news source. it’s the BBC. they have just aired a new documentary based on oval office tapes, which proves something about the American presidency and modern history that even the most conspiratorial among us would not be able to believe. it’s about the 1968 election. the democratic electorate was split. they were not unified behind their candidate. on the right, southern white democrats who were against civil rights, they were being peeled off to vote for George Wallace, the symbol of proud segregation. also, different problem for the democrats. people hated the Vietnam war. and the president at the time was a democrat, Lyndon B. Johnson. so if you were against the war, as most Americans at that point were — this is the gallop polling on the war — the number of people who thought it was a mistake — if you were against the war as increasingly everybody was, you were so the psyched to vote for LBJ’s successor. so the democrats were losing their appeal in the south because of racism, and they were losing the anti-war vote. the republican candidate tried to take advantage of that split, and was this handsome devil. Nixon in 1968 was running against a democratic party that he knew was split. he was, in response, pledging to get rid of the draft. and he claimed to have a plan to end the war. he argued that if you wanted the war to end, you needed to elect him. you needed to vote the democrats out of office because clearly LBJ and his party, the democrats and the democratic party, Hubert Humphrey had no idea how to end the war. when you needed was total change at the white house. the democrats had to go to Nixon could come in and end Vietnam. but then less than a week before the election, it all went horribly wrong for Richard Nixon, because less than a week before election, on halloween night, 1968, the democratic president, LBJ, went on TV in a surprise nationally televised address. he made a surprise announcement that peace was at hand. the communist side, the Vietnamese side was going to be make concessions at peace talks. the south Vietnamese were going to agree to a deal. peace was at hand. the terms were all set. peace was at hand. in recognition of the fact that peace was about to be declared, the united states would step back right away and stop all military operations in vehement. LBJ said that on Thursday night. the election was going to be Tuesday. turns out the democrats know how to end this war. that was bad news for Richard Nixon, but good news for the country who wanted the war to be over. good news for the people fighting the war. this was good news, right? almost. Thursday night LBJ made that announcement, that peace was about to be agreed to, by all sides in Vietnam.

That was Thursday night. by Saturday morning, never mind, deal was off. peace was not at hand because the south Vietnamese side has decided actually it didn’t want the deal. in fact, they didn’t want to talk about it deal. they pulled out of the peace talks. and so the war was back on. what happened? what happened between Thursday and Saturday? now we know.

>> good morning. how are you, my friend?

>> fine.

>> I’ve got one that’s pretty rough for you. we have found that our friend, the republican nominee, our California friend, has been playing on the outskirts with our enemies and our friends both, he’s been doing it through rather subterranean sources here, and he has been saying to the allies that you’re going to get sold out. you better not give away your liberty just a few hours before i can preserve it for you. Mrs. Chennault is contacting their ambassador. this is not guess work. she’s young and attractive. she’s a pretty good-looking girl. she’s around town, and she is warning them to not get pulled in on this Johnson move.

>> president Lyndon Johnson, 1968, Saturday morning, November 1st, explaining to senator Richard Russell what had gone wrong with this peace deal that everybody thought was going to end the war. LBJ was so sure this was going to end the war that he went on TV Thursday night. the reason peace did not happen, what he was explaining on the phone, is that the republican nominee for president that year, Richard Nixon, had intervened in the peace talks to blow them up. he used an intermediary who was involved in the talks to approach the south Vietnamese Vietnamese side and told them don’t do it. these peace talks in Paris was not going to be a good deal for them. they should not participate. they should just wait until after the election when he, Richard Nixon, would be president and he’d give them a much better deal. Johnson was going to sell them out. he, Richard Nixon, of the one he should deal with. Nixon’s intermediary was caught on tape telling the ambassador, just hang on. we need the war to keep going through the election. it’s outrageous, right? the war could have ended. it was on the verge of ending, except a candidate for office in our country thought that the war ending would help his opponent in the election. he thought he’d have a better chance of getting elected if the war kept going. so instead of getting the war to end, he did what he did. it was astonishing. and president Johnson thought so too.

>> and they oughtn’t to be doing this. i think it would shock America if a principal candidate was playing with a source like this on a matter this important.

>> yeah.

>> president Lyndon Johnson there on the same day as that earlier tape remark be thatter as far as he could tell, this is treason. he says it repeatedly on the tapes. he thinks that is a hanging offense. he thinks that was treason. this was four days before the election that year. having thought that the war was going to be over, now the president finds out the peace deal fell through because a candidate who wanted there not to be peace before the election intervened to make one sidewalk away. now, why didn’t LBJ say anything publicly? this is right before the election. can you imagine how the country would have reacted to that? this is a war the whole country was against. it was going to be over except candidate Nixon intervened to undo the peace deal and keep the war going? can you imagine how angry the American public would have been. but LBJ did not say anything publicly at the time because he thought he couldn’t. the reason he thought he couldn’t is the way he found out what Nixon had done. the FBI illegally wire-tapped the phones of the south Vietnamese ambassador. we couldn’t let anybody know that we were illegally listening into the ambassador’s phone lines so they couldn’t let anybody know what they had heard. so Nixon got away with it. and the October surprise. the Halloween night surprise that the war was ending right before the election, that October surprises ended up getting undone. anybody who was anti-war in the country had no reason to vote for a democrat. the racist right wing voted peeled off the the vote on the other side. and yes, Nixon won. he got by barely. squeaked by on the basis that he was the guy who knew how to end the war, not those dumb democrats. and of course Nixon did not know how to end the war. he didn’t have a plan. and instead of the war ending on Halloween in 1968, the war went on five more years, in which time 15,000 Americans were killed as were untold numbers of Vietnamese. so that happened. that actually happened, and now in 2013, what are we supposed to do with that information? LBJ is dead, Nixon is dead, George Wallace is dead. 15,000 Americans are dead who otherwise would not have been. how does this get made right? it cannot get made right because the people of this decision cannot be brought back from the dead. you also can’t get revenge. you can’t indict Nixon’s ghost. but you can refuse to let him get away with it again. we can make sure it is a way we tell his history and the history of modern politics. you have to include it in the history, both so nobody gets away with it in the long run, but also so we don’t do it again. so we at least don’t dismiss this kind of possibility as some conspiracy theory of nonsense. so we know there is precedent for this particular kind of evil.

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Filed under Campaigning, Criminal Activity, Elections, History, Hypocrisy, Law, Politics, Stupidity