Tag Archives: Crap

May 14, 2012 · 0:00

Fashion Maverick

Did you know that I am a fashion maverick?  It’s true.  I have been for years.  Or am I a fashion maven?  I forget.  But I’m one of the two.

Actually, I was truly a young fashion trailblazer.  In 6th grade, I became the very first 10-year-old girl to wear nylons to school.  Yup.  I did.  I was very grown up.  And I wore them with a garter belt the boys found irresistible.  No, I was a good girl.  I didn’t try to show it to them.  But it was the sixties, the mini-skirt era.  And I was, at that time, really good in math.  The teacher, clearly a perv, often had me write the correct answers to homework problems on the blackboard.  High up on the blackboard.  There certainly was a lot of noise when I had my back turned.  Boys were so stupid.

I’m pretty sure I first wore nylons on one of those days when my mother went to work early and didn’t see me.  But still, I did it first.  The popular girls just couldn’t believe it was me – that I got there before they did.

Now you guys reading this are nodding off.  Stop it.  Just wait.  Skim.

Throughout junior high and high school, my fashion firsts continued.  I was also the first person to wear torn up blue jeans to school, and to go braless.  (See guys, I told you it would improve.)

Anyway, now that I am an adult, I am a wee bit more self-conscious in my fashion trail-blazing.  So I need some advice.

I’ve just gotten this new pair of jeans and, well, I just can’t decide where to wear them first.  I was so excited when I first saw these pants.   They’re just so me.

A special pocket for my concealed weapon!

They’re made by a Texas textile company, American Tactical Apparel.   The idea belongs to Brian Hoffner, a long-time Houston police officer who describes himself as “kind of a renaissance man,” according to this article.  Interestingly, the idea to make special pants to conceal his gun, came to him (ahem) while he was visiting a prostitute with a gun strapped to his thigh.  (I don’t know why, but I have few commercially successful ideas when I am visiting hookers.  And even fewer when I am afraid that I might shoot myself.)

Anyway, these jeans, along with a line of khakis and other apparel, are designed for the fashion-conscious gun-toter.  And it’s none too soon if you ask me.  It has been such an inconvenience sticking my handgun in my bra.

What do you think?  Where should I wear these jeans – and should I wear my Susan G. Komen Pink Hope 22 or go semi-automatic?

Who could forget Susan G. Komen's "Shooting for the Cure"Please, help me out here.

The only problem is there is only one holder.  And it is pretty small.  Where can I put my M-16?

56 Comments

Filed under Childhood Traumas, Elections, Fashion, Gun control, Humor, Hypocrisy, Law, Stupidity

Tagged as , , ,

May 11, 2012 · 0:00

Word Press, Quit Messin’ With Us

It’s been a fun week, now, hasn’t it, Word Press.

You did some really good things this week, like Fresh Pressin’ two of my favorite bloggers, Darla at She’s A Maineiac and Nancy at NotQuiteOld.

And, through Fresh Pressed (which I don’t usually bother with), I stumbled onto a woman who is stomping in my old stomping grounds and blogging about it at The Adventures of Miss Widget.  She has some great pictures of towns and vineyards near Geneva, Switzerland.

But

You knew it was coming.  There is always a “but.”

But automatically subscribing me to every comment on every blog I comment on, well that was nasty.  Of course, it did give me inspiration for my entry into K8did’s first round in her 7 Deadly Sins contest:   Gluttony.

But then it got worse.

Because today I found out that nobody was writing anything.  Nope.  My Fiftyfourandahalf@gmail.com email address was empty when I woke up and it continues to be empty.  Because instead of sending me emails when my bloggin’ buddies post, and when I want to read the comments of folks commenting on some, but not all, well, Word Press, you aren’t doing that any more.

We all have our own preferences, styles and management techniques for reading, commenting, reading comments, etc.  Can we please just keep our own preferences instead of yours?

Let me say this simply:

Word Press, Quit Messing With Us.

63 Comments

Filed under Stupidity, Technology, Word Press

Tagged as , , ,

March 29, 2012 · 0:00

I Tried to Resist. Really I Did.

Really.  I tried to resist posting this clip.  I tried hard.

I wrestled with my sense of “oh I can’t subject my international readers to this” and my sense of humor.  My tendency to show serious things in a funny way.  My senses of humor won.  My fundamental need to post about hypocrisy won.   Because this is as close to the truth as I have seen in a long time.

Happily found on Dailykos.com at this link.

62 Comments

Filed under Elections, Family, Health and Medicine, Humor, Hypocrisy, Politics, Stupidity, Voting

Tagged as , ,

March 10, 2012 · 0:00

Just Another Word

I just don’t get it.  And I’m hoping someone can help me out here.  You see, my parents left the Catholic Church when I was only 10.  So there is a whole lot about religion that I just don’t get. (Yeah, it’s their fault.)

I got the basics.  I don’t kill people or steal or do other bad things.  I love my neighbor, but not too much.  I’m involved with and engaged in my community, but just not in an organized religion sort of way.  Lack of church membership doesn’t make me a bad person, although I realize that some people would argue with that.  I can handle being on my own should “The Rapture” come to pass.

The thing is, a vocal minority of those folks are really getting all up in my face these days.  They are bouncing up and down and crying “religious freedom” all day and night.  And I don’t know about you, but I think the word “freedom” has been hijacked.   Whenever someone tries to tell me that they are “protecting freedom,” well, it’s more likely that he or she is trying to take away some of my freedoms.  And yours.

Yup.  I’m getting the feeling that “Freedom” is becoming less and less free, right here at home.  That noise is Thomas Jefferson and the other founding fathers rolling in their graves.  You remember, those cool old guys who set up a government with a clear separation of Church and State?  I’m pretty sure they’re ticked.

So here is my issue.  My problem.  My query.  When God created man (and women), however that happened, He did it in His image right?  Isn’t that what the bible says?  I’m pretty sure that I got that part right.

These guys do look alike, don't they? But is beauty only skin deep? (Google Image)

Then here’s my question:  Was that image complete?  Whole hog?  I mean, did that “image” include the brain?  And if so, doesn’t that make using one’s brain “Godly” or “Godlike” or, at a minimum, “Good”? Doesn’t that mean that to NOT use one’s brain is ungodly?  And shouldn’t we use our God-given brains to make things better for God’s creatures, including our fellow man?

You see why I’m confused.  Maybe you are too.

I just can’t figure out why some folks apparently think that we were created in God’s image, but only on the outside.  On the inside, well, I guess we’re just created in someone else’s image.  I guess the only interior options would be the fish in the seas or the animals on the land.  That just doesn’t seem Kosher, now, does it?

Spencer Tracy's Father Flanagan doesn't look at all like Rick Santorum -- Google Image

If we were created in God’s image, inside and out, shouldn’t that mean that the wonders created by mankind are God’s work, too?  Isn’t that, well, logical?

So I just don’t understand the folks who hate science, who disdain learning, and who seem to want to go back to times when the folks organizing religion weren’t exactly like Father Flanagan.

Because it seems to me that Rick Santorum, the Virginia Legislature and the GOP in general look and act a lot like these guys:

Fun Times with the Spanish Inquisition -- Google Image

Hey, hey, don’t leave women out!  Those sluts.

Don't want to leave the little woman out of the Inquisition! (Google Image)

Because if these “religious freedom” folks have their way, “Freedom” will, in fact, be just another word for “nothin’ left to lose.”

Perhaps I should have taken more philosophy courses and fewer writing ones.  Because I just don’t get it.

59 Comments

Filed under Climate Change, Elections, Family, Global Warming, Humor, Hypocrisy, Neighbors, Science, Stupidity, Voting

Tagged as , , ,

March 6, 2012 · 0:00

Lock-step Ain’t the Two-Step

Poor Lisa.  Lisa Murkowski.  Senator Lisa Murkowski (R-AK).  She’s upset.  She’s angry.  She’s really sorry.  Poor, Poor Lisa.  It’s not her fault.  Someone else made her do it.  If it happened to you, wouldn’t it make YOU mad?

Poor, Poor Lisa Murkowski (R-AK)

You see, Poor Lisa voted for the Blunt Amendment last Thursday, and now she’s upset.  You remember the Blunt Amendment, don’t you?  It’s the one that would allow any employer to refuse to include healthcare coverage for any condition he or she objects to on moral or religious grounds.

Poor Lisa needs some sympathy.  Here, Lisa, will this help?

Poor Lisa wasn’t upset when she voted for the Blunt Amendment, though.  It wasn’t until afterwards, when she met up with some of the voters (who had written her name in and elected her after her staff misspelled her name on the ballot).  The voters weren’t very happy with her.  In fact, they were a wee bit miffed.  Poor Lisa, now she is very sorry indeed.

Here’s what Poor Lisa told the Anchorage Daily News:

“I have never had a vote I’ve taken where I have felt that I let down more people that believed in me,” she said.

Got a hanky?

Poor Lisa.  She kept making excuses and told the nice newspaper folks all these important things.  Things voters need to remember next time she is up for election:

She’s a moderate. [I can tell!]  She supports abortion rights and contraception coverage [Of course she does – didn’t she prove that with her vote FOR the Blunt Amendment?].  She also doesn’t line up completely with the Catholic Church when it comes to birth control.

I’m so very glad that what she said when it was no longer important cleared up that confusing vote of hers!  Aren’t you?

Because, you see, she’d meant to make a statement about religious freedom.  But those silly voters read it as a vote against contraception coverage for women!  Against women’s health!  Against family planning!  Oops!

Imagine that!  Imagine a world where someone with a vagina and a vote might just think that this vote against women’s health was a really a vote against women’s rights??????  I tell ya, some voters just want everything.

You see, Poor Lisa just did exactly what the Republican Leadership told her to do, just as she has in every vote she’s cast since she got to the Senate.  Republicans are really good at lock-step, every time there’s a vote.  Republicans vote in lock-step even when it goes against their own beliefs — and that’s just what Poor Lisa did.  

And that’s a huge part of the reason why nothing works in Congress.  Republican intransigence.

It’s time.  Time for this issue to become a rallying cry for thinking people – a make or break issue.  And it’s not just a women’s issue, either.

And you know, the President isn’t going to be the only one on the ballot.  And he isn’t the only one who might impact your life.

*****

Photo from TalkingPointsMemo.com (photo credit given on the photo but my eyes can’t read it)

39 Comments

Filed under Elections, Humor, Hypocrisy, Stupidity, Uncategorized, Voting

Tagged as ,