Category Archives: Elections

October 27, 2012 · 0:00

Idiot Wind

Damn it!  My most recent pipe dream has just come crashing down around my ears.

You know, the one where I become a wildly successful, NY Times bestselling novelist because of the incredible stories I make up out of a combination of thin air, personal experience and plagiarism?

Yeah, that dream.

And it came crashing down because I must accept the fact that life is so much more colorful than anything I could make up.  Yup, life is just wayyyyyy more exciting than my stories.   Real life, especially during the runup to an election in the United States is in fact, completely surreal.

So don’t be rushin’ around to the bookstore.  You’ll be disappointed.

What was it that forced reality into my otherwise happy existence?

Naturally, it was something I read.  And while I am still drooling in shock, I am just not quite sure what it all means.  I mean, how will things turn out?  Because you see, I just read, that the women’s vote, which I’ve been counting on to get Obama over the edge, will be determined by where women are in their menstrual cycle.   I had thought that, well, thought might play a role.  But I guess not.

Apparently, it’s true.  It’s been studied!  So it must be right, right?

First of all, you won’t hear me comment on the fact that this study was conducted in Texas.  Nope.  Not one word.  Total and absolute silence on the study’s lone star status.

The study was conducted by Kristina Durante at U of T.

 

Jimmy Durante and Pumpkin

The study presented the results of an internet survey of 502 women with regular menstrual cycles and who were not using hormone-based contraceptives (the pill, the patch and the like).

The researchers found that during the fertile time of the month, when levels of the hormone estrogen are high, single women appeared more likely to vote for Obama and committed women appeared more likely to vote for Romney, by a margin of at least 20%, Durante said. This seems to be the driver behind the researchers’ overall observation that single women were inclined toward Obama and committed women leaned toward Romney.  [Yeah, that’s my emphasis. How could I let you miss that gem?]

That’s ’cause, according to Durante (Kristina not Jimmy), women are feeling sexier, which of course makes them sluttier in my mind or, in Durante’s it makes them:

“lean more toward liberal attitudes on abortion and marriage equality.”

In other important research, Durante has also studied your period’s impact on other vital decisions, like your shopping choices.

When you go to Vote,

Go feeling really slutty —

Vote a Straight Democratic Ticket!

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I found this fascinating information on Daily Kos, where I find some of the best stuff.  They found it at CNN!  Yup, CNN, “The Most Trusted Name In News!”  For some reason, though, CNN took down the link.

But here is the link Kos provided.  Cause you really don’t want to miss this one.

You’re welcome.

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October 24, 2012 · 0:00

Oh, Now I Get It!

It’s  getting really confusing.

Here’s my problem:

If it is God’s will that  a woman gets pregnant when she’s raped, how do these lady parts that shut down and prevent pregnancy fit in?

You see why I’m confused now, don’t you?

But naturally, Bloggers have saved the day.

Yup, they answered my question.  Illustrated the situation.  And now you too will understand it all.  You’re welcome.

Here is a guide posted on one of my favorite blogs, DailyKos.com  (that’s where I learn all kinds of fascinating things).  I just had to share this illustration so you won’t be confused either.  It was originally posted there by Connecticutie but updated by brainwrap today in light of Richard Mourdock’s comment at last night’s debate.

Understand it now?  Good.  I knew you would.

*     *     *

Full disclosure here.

I am not pro-abortion.  I have never had an abortion, and I recall how when I was young and single that I grappled with the question:  “If I get pregnant, what will I do?”  It was never a question that needed an actionable answer.  I was lucky.  Many others weren’t.

You know, I don’t know or know of anyone who is, actually, pro-abortion, come to think of it.  And you know what?  I think that the moniker “pro-choice” is a poor one.  It’s part of the problem.  It sounds too much like a casual decision.  And of course, it is anything but.  I think that the poor name choice demeans the difficult decision that women, either alone or with their partner or their parent or a caring friend, must grapple with.  Richard Mourdock, Todd Akin, Paul Ryan and the rest of the jokers in the GOP shouldn’t be in on this very personal crisis resolution.

We should call it something else.  But I’ve been  unable to come up with a better name, either.  Maybe that’s why we got stuck with the one we got.

Nevertheless, we fought the battle over abortion 40 years ago.  Forty Fucking Years Ago.  And people who knew that it was better to have it safe and regulated as opposed to done in back alleys under unsanitary conditions at the cost of many women’s lives, well they/we won it.  It happened just over a decade after the first contraceptives were approved for use in the United States.

And of course, the GOP is against contraception, too.

A Romney presidency will basically guarantee that the folks who don’t really understand how human biology works will control all the things we women need to control our reproductive health.  Which, of  course, significantly impacts our economic health as well.

[Hey!  Maybe this is the GOP jobs plan — keep women barefoot and pregnant and out of the workplace!]

Many of these Republicans don’t even quite understand how basic human biology works, but they are willing to legislate it nevertheless.  They don’t actually know when in the, ummm, process, conception occurs and/or how contraception actually occurs.  They don’t understand that oral contraceptives do not prevent the sperm from fertilizing the egg but rather prevents the fertilized egg from implanting in the womb. 

So that fertilized egg?  If the GOP has its way, that egg becomes more important than the mother.  Yup.  That’s what the “Personhood” Amendment does.  The one VP Candidate Paul Ryan sponsored along with Senate Candidate Todd Akin.  It gives property rights to fertilized eggs.  Human ones, that is.  They haven’t made any inroads in giving chicken eggs the keys to the henhouse. Yet.

A Romney presidency will guarantee Supreme Court appointments will overturn Roe v. Wade.  Everybody knows that.

And Obama victory will prevent that.  A Democratic Senate will prevent that, too.

But there is more.

In the last 2 years while the GOP has controlled the U.S. House of Representatives, they have passed 55 bills outlawing abortion.  They have passed 0 jobs bills.  Yeah, that’s a ZERO.  A big goose egg (ahem).  And of course, they campaigned on JOBS, JOBS, JOBs! in 2010.  That’s the promise that gave them the House of Representatives.  And then they blocked all bills that would have helped create jobs.

We really need to get rid of these crazies.  We need to get rid of the nutcases, the fanatics that want to control our bodies, eliminate our liberties, stop on our freedoms and who then wrap it in the flag and sing The Star Spangled Banner.

Well, Damn it, that’s my flag too, and my national anthem.  Keep your crazy ass hands off of them both.

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October 23, 2012 · 0:00

Wait, Wait, I have a Question!

OK, I am not even going to try to be cute or funny or anything of the sort.

Here are my three questions for Mitt Romney:

Q:  If I move to the Middle East, do I get to control my own lady-parts andget equal pay for equal work?  Because you don’t think I am entitled to do that here in the U.S., do you?

ROMNEY: Well, my strategy is pretty straightforward, which is to go after the bad guys, to make sure we do our very best to interrupt them, to — to kill them, to take them out of the picture.

But my strategy is broader than that. That’s — that’s important, of course. But the key that we’re going to have to pursue is a — is a pathway to get the Muslim world to be able to reject extremism on its own. […]

And how do we do that? A group of Arab scholars came together, organized by the U.N., to look at how we can help the — the world reject these — these terrorists. And the answer they came up with was this:

One, more economic development …

Number two, better education.

Number three, gender equality.

Number four, the rule of law.

Q:  If you change your position on every issue based on who you are talking to, how the hell can any foreign leader know when you mean what you say, when you’re pandering, and when you are telling an outright lie?

And lastly, at least for the moment,

 Q:  You frequently talk about all your record in Massachusetts, about which you claim to be very proud. If you did such a bang up job, Why are the folks in Massachusetts going to vote for President Obama?

 

 *     *     *

If you live in the United States and would like to help GET OUT THE VOTE, you can make calls no matter where you live through the Obama website:  http://www.barackobama.com/

Remember, Elections Matter.  So do results.

 VOTE DEMOCRATIC!

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October 18, 2012 · 0:00

Throne Update

It seems like just the other day when I was telling you about David Siegel in my post Robbin’ a Better Hood.

You know, it was the story of David, the poor billionaire CEO of Westgate Resorts who likes to sit on a golden cherub-encrusted throne.  In case you can’t remember, he threatened his employees with termination if Mitt Romney doesn’t become president, if Obama wins and raises his taxes.  He also complained about not getting any happy hours.

Oh, it was just the other day!

Well, I’ve learned so much since.  And I just gotta share.

You see, I learned that apparently CEO’s are pack animals.  And a bunch of other CEOs are doing the same thing to their employees so that they can protect their billions.

At first I was confused.  How could so many folks, living high on the hog, come up with the very same idea?

Then I learned just last night that there is a common thread here that, well, I for one would never have guessed.

Because guess who is telling those CEO’s to do that?  Guess who is showing his leadership ability by actually getting billionaire CEOs to follow an order?  Guess who has the morals and ethics of a crack whore?

[26:30]  I hope you make it very clear to your employees what you believe is in the best interest of your enterprise and therefore their job and their future in the upcoming elections. And whether you agree with me or you agree with President Obama, or whatever your political view, I hope, you pass those along to your employees.  Mitt Romney, June 6, 2012.

Yup, it’s Mitt.  The guy whose team is in favor of voter suppression (heard the one about the Arizona Voter ID cards that were sent out with the wrong date for election date – funny thing, it’s only wrong on the Spanish ones).

Can you say “Watergate?”  Can you say “Iran Contra?”  Can you say “Tammany Hall?”  Are you listening Mitt Romney?

I heard that Ann will be cancelling her next few campaign stops.  She’s out shopping for furniture for the Oval Office.

Or maybe they should go on the Truman Balcony.
The view of the peasants is way better from there..

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October 11, 2012 · 0:00

Robbin’ A Better Hood

Many of you think that I am a communist with socialist sympathies.  Or a socialist with communist proclivities.  Or that I want to take from the rich and give to the poor.  That I have fantasies of becoming the next Mother Theresa or at least Madonna.  The singer, not the, you know, Madonna.

Nope. Not me at all.
That gum would be in my earrings

But it’s not at all true.  I’m not a socialist, I’m a liberal.  Someday the GOP will understand the difference between a liberal and a socialist.  But certainly not before it’s convenient.  And definitely not before November.

Personally, I work hard and am pretty well paid for my efforts.  I like that.

I also like the fact that my husband works less hard and is paid even better.  Of course that would piss me off royally if I didn’t get to spend more than my share of that haul.

That said, well, I know I’ve been lucky, especially when it comes to the folks I’ve worked for.  Yes, I’ve been incredibly lucky in bosses.  None of them has asked me to do anything illegal, unethical or even too terribly yucky.  Stupid sometimes, annoying at others, but legal and honest and ethical.   And none have ever threatened me.

So when I read this article about a very different type of boss, well I saw red.

Not exactly like this,
but it was definitely red.

Did you hear about David Siegel, the owner of Westgate Resorts?  His estimated net worth is close to $2 Billion.  Yeah.  That’s with a “B.”

You may recall him from the stories about his house, Versailles:

A quaint little cottage, ain’t it?
A mere 90,000 sq. ft.

Here’s the ballroom.

Doesn’t YOUR house have a ballroom?

David made his money selling Time Shares.  You know, those “must have” vacation resort scams?  My parents owned one.  Thanks, David.  Can you say “total rip off”?  I bet you say it a lot.

Now David’s worried.  And that’s never a good thing when all that money is at stake.  You see, David is worried that President Obama may get re-elected.  And David’s worried that if President Obama is re-elected, he might have to pay more taxes.  So he threatened his 7,000 employees, telling them that they may just not have a job if Obama gets 4 more years.

Actually, David held back.  He didn’t cross that line.  No sirreee Bob.  He didn’t tell the folks dependent on him who to vote for!  That would be bullying!  That would be unethical!  That would be illegal!

Here’s what he did say.  I’ll use his words, not mine.  Here’s what David A. Siegel, Billionnaire, said in an email sent to all of his employees on Monday:

As your employer, I can’t tell you whom to vote for, and I certainly wouldn’t interfere with your right to vote for whomever you choose. In fact, I encourage you to vote for whomever you think will serve your interests the best.

Good start, don’t you think.  Then he explained to his workers just how hard the life of a billionaire can be:

I eat, live, and breathe this company every minute of the day, every day of the week. There is no rest. There is no weekend. There is no happy hour.

I admit I’d be ticked off if there was no happy hour.  Imagine.

And then David mentioned that his employees might just want to think carefully about who they vote for come November:

If any new taxes are levied on me, or my company, as our current President plans, I will have no choice but to reduce the size of this company. Rather than grow this company I will be forced to cut back. This means fewer jobs, less benefits and certainly less opportunity for everyone.

So, when you make your decision to vote, ask yourself, which candidate understands the economics of business ownership and who doesn’t? Whose policies will endanger your job? Answer those questions and you should know who might be the one capable of protecting and saving your job. [Emphasis mine.]

David on his Golden Throne

Talk about folks who feel “Entitled”!

So, in spite of the fact that the Presidency offers no such powers, I’m going to lobby hard for something.  Nationalization of David Siegel’s assets.

Yup, I’m going to work towards nationalization of the assets of this asshole.  Just the one asshole.  We could use a new National Park in Central Florida, wouldn’t you say?  Disney gets so crowded these days.  We can call it “OverTheTop-Land.”

Of course, if I hear of more of those buckaroo billionaires screwing with people’s right to vote, well, I might just rethink just how keen I am on nationalization.  Because you know what they say about socialists/communists.  Once they start marching, all the dominoes fall.

Elections matter.  And nobody has the right to tell their employees how or for whom to vote.

[And if anybody seriously thinks that I am either a socialist or a communist, or that I think there is any authority for anyone to nationalize the assets of anybody in the country, you are reading the wrong blog.]

*     *     *

A special thank you to my friend, frequent commenter and budding author, Clinton, for telling me about this article:  CEO to Workers: I May Fire You if Obama Wins

All the pictures are from Google Images.  Thanks, Google.  What was life like before you?

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