Monthly Archives: October 2013

Which Witch?

As a kid, I looked forward to the annual playing of The Wizard of Oz on TV as much as Christmas and Halloween combined.  The music, the friendship, the scary witch.  Until high school, I’d never seen it in color, so I hadn’t even witnessed the magical transformation from Kansas to Oz, or what was so funny about the line “A horse of a different color” being a horse that actually changed colors.

In high school, I was invited to my friend Laurie’s house to watch it in color.  And it was magical.  To see something so very familiar that looked so very different, well, it was, as I already said, magical.

Interestingly, Laurie’s mother actually knew the actress, Margaret Hamilton, who terrified me for years as the Wicked Witch of the West.  I learned about the fact that Ms. Hamilton’s costume had actually caught on fire in one scene, putting a stop to several other would-be fiery scenes.  But mostly I learned that she was just a nice lady who played a memorable part.  It all took place while I was dreaming of becoming an actress myself.

I saw this clip on dailykos.com.  Showing the transformation of Margaret Hamilton into the Wicked Witch of the West, and her explaining that she was just playing dress-up.  Anybody who has kids might want to share this video with their very scared kids!

Happy Halloween!

28 Comments

Filed under Childhood Traumas, Daily Kos, Holidays, Humor

The 3 Ps: Politics, Penises and Pooches

Politics Penises and Pooches

I got nothing to add.  Except my thanks to my dog-lovin’ sister-in-law who sent me this picture.  The origin is unknown.  My guess is the Values Voters gang.

61 Comments

Filed under Criminal Activity, Dogs, Sex Scandals

An End To Your Pain

As the blogosphere’s most acclaimed fake medical expert, today I am writing to tell you how you can easily and cheaply eliminate your chronic pain.

You’re welcome.

You see, a new study of 1,500 people found that pop music was the most effective pain reliever.  Not classical.  Not Rock.  Not Indie.  Pop music.  Not drugs.

According to this article in an online publication I’ve never heard of before, the best songs to ease your aching back are, in this order:

Bridge Over Troubled Water by Simon & Garfunkel

Angels by Robbie Williams

Albatross by Fleetwood Mac

Candle in the Wind by Elton John

Easy by The Commodores

So there you go.   Have a nice, pain free weekend.

You’re welcome.

70 Comments

Filed under Bloggin' Buddies, Health and Medicine, Mental Health, Taking Care of Each Other

Why Should They Get it Better?

The voice inside my head is getting louder and louder.  It has been happening for over three weeks now.  I have to let it out or my head will explode.

It’s not what you think.

I haven’t been trying any of the products I research, or no more than usual.

I haven’t become a schizophrenic hearing demons that chant “kill, kill, kill.”

I haven’t even become a Tea Party member muttering “screw the poor, screw the folks who don’t look like me, don’t touch my Medicare.” Nope.

It’s just my Dad’s voice.  But he won’t shut up.  He keeps on saying:

“For Cryin’ Out Loud, Lease, What Did You Expect?”

It’s no use telling him that I agree with him and that really, I didn’t expect this whole thing to go smoothly.  He was a hard man to beat in an argument before, but since his death it has been absolutely impossible to win an argument with the man.   He’s gone all passive-aggressive on me, the bastard.

But in point of fact, I figured that the roll-out of Obamacare would be just like it has been since October 1.  Full of problems that lead everyone to bang their head on their desk, throw their laptops out the window and threaten bodily harm to anyone who interrupts them when they’re just about done.  I could have told you that before the bill passed either House of Congress, was signed by the President.  I could have told you there would be huge problems even before the Supreme Court deemed it constitutional.

Remember how I am an expert patient?  An expert patient who has had health-and-therefore-insurance issues for 40 years?  I am pretty sure I have fought with each and every single insurance company that has done business in the United States, and a few in Europe.  And this includes the six hours I spent online and on the phone with CareFirst this past Monday trying to figure out the fine details of the two different policies I had to choose from.  The recordings of my running commentary would not be suitable for training purposes.

So really, I think the folks who set up Healthcare.gov  did the folks who qualify for insurance under the Affordable Care Act a favor by having so many problems on the website.

Because they’ve gotten just the first taste of what it’s like to deal with a god damn insurance company.

*     *     *

With heartfelt apologies to my Dad, who was an insurance agent and would have been able to tell everyone that this is exactly what they should have expected.

Apologies also to my favorite live insurance agent, Peg of PegOLeg.com who is probably too busy working on getting folks covered to read this post anyway.

Thanks to both List of X for his two funny posts on the rollout here and here, and Moe of Whatever Works for inspiring me to comment on their blogs and inspired me to write this one.

39 Comments

Filed under Bloggin' Buddies, Criminal Activity, Crohn's Disease, Family, Health and Medicine, Humor

As I Was Sayin’

As anybody who hasn’t rolled their eyes, clicked “Like” and then clicked “X” to scurry out of my political posts knows, I’ve been saying since I started FiftyFourAndAHalf.com (because I was pissed off at the GOP), that a huge part of the problem is folks drank the “don’t tax me, bro” kool-aid.  That people don’t understand that Ronald Reagan was wrong.

There.  I said it.  Lightening did not strike.  The lights didn’t even flicker.  The planet continued to revolve on its axis and on its course around the sun.

Reagan was wrong many times in my opinion.  But he was never more wrong than when he put into motion the dysfunction we are now experiencing in our government when he said:

The Government is Not the Solution to the Problem;

Government IS the Problem.

Government, because it is made up of fallible human beings, is by definition, fallible, too.  But we don’t need to cheer on its destruction, its dissolution, its dysfunction.

And so I will defer to President Obama, who reminded us all, whether we needed reminding or not, that there is a vital role in our country for the Federal Government.  But a whole lot of folks had forgotten.

We hear all the time about how government is the problem.  Well, it turns out we rely on it in a whole lot of ways.  Not only does it keep us strong through our military and our law enforcement, it plays a vital role in caring for our seniors and our veterans, educating our kids, making sure our workers are trained for the jobs that are being created, arming our businesses with the best science and technology so they can compete with companies from other countries.  It plays a key role in keeping our food and our toys and our workplaces safe.  It helps folks rebuild after a storm.  It conserves our natural resources.  It finances startups.  It helps to sell our products overseas.  It provides security to our diplomats abroad.

So let’s work together to make government work better, instead of treating it like an enemy or purposely making it work worse.  That’s not what the founders of this nation envisioned when they gave us the gift of self-government.  You don’t like a particular policy or a particular president, then argue for your position.  Go out there and win an election.  Push to change it. But don’t break it.  Don’t break what our predecessors spent over two centuries building.  That’s not being faithful to what this country is about.

I will now return this blog to its normal realm of humor, things (other than the GOP) I think are stupid, and incredibly embarrassing situations I write about rather than telling them to people who can identify me.

(Google Image)

(Google Image)

69 Comments

Filed under Campaigning, Elections, GOP Government Shutdown, History, Law, Taking Care of Each Other, Voting