I’m Toast

When you have chronic health problems like I do, there’s always something new to worry about.

  • Will this procedure hurt?
  • Will this procedure make my life worse?
  • Will this procedure kill me?
Photo Credit 4029TV.com

Photo Credit 4029TV.com

Until today, though, I never asked myself:

  • Will this procedure turn me into a flaming torch?

Butt that is precisely what happened to a woman undergoing surgery in Japan recently.  And it happened when she did what all of us fear whenever we have a medical procedure in the southern hemisphere.

She farted.

Fortunately for her, she was asleep on the operating table.

Unfortunately for her, the gas she passed was ignited by the laser the surgeons were using on her.

According to the article I read,

The fire burned much of her body, including her waist and legs. Her condition is unclear.

The poor woman.  I really feel terrible for her.  It’s embarrassing enough to break wind when you’re in a humiliating enough position.

Butt now I have something else to worry about the next time I have to have a procedure.

I’m toast.


Filed under ; Don't Make Me Feel Perky Tonigh, A Little Restraint, Perhaps, Adult Traumas, Farts, Flatulence

63 responses to “I’m Toast

  1. Pingback: The Impending Closure | Snakes in the Grass

  2. O. M. G. This should be filed in the category, “you can’t make this shiz up.” Next time you go in, better strap a fire extinguisher to your thigh.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. It’s no fair when fart stories are serious. I mean, really…

    I’ve been buried deep in all the things life throws at a person, but I needed to carve out some time to visit my Peeps! Miss you!❤

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I don’t want to make a joke… but I do sort of want to… arggggh

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Damn! I think I will be rethinking my hip surgery.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. I heard you were changing your name to Melba. Now I understand why.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Okay, so now each time I accidentally fart, instead of being humiliated, I can be thankful I’m not on my operating table.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. Wow. I have no witty retort for this. In fact, making jokes seems to be a bad idea, but damn…

    Liked by 2 people

  9. Just when you think you’ve heard it all….Could you imagine the convo before the surgery?…you’ll be going home within 24-48 hrs…they’ll need to put a caveat on that now.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. That story is so not funny, at least not to the poor lady with the burns. But I laughed anyway. Does that make me a bad person? The only thing I ever worried about (at least previously) when facing surgery was whether I would say something politically incorrect while under anesthesia. I once asked my surgeon if I had said anything, and judging by the smile he tried to hide, I can only imagine what I might have blurted out.

    Liked by 2 people

    • I actually think the story is fabricated. That makes me willing to laugh at it — or at least laugh at it without guilt.

      I don’t worry too much about what inappropriate things I say under anesthesia. I say plenty of them when I’m perfectly lucid!

      But I do think that there must be another oath that doctors must take to not reveal the silly things we all say!

      Liked by 1 person

  11. I guess that’s why they want you to have an empty stomach before surgery. I’mean having surgery next week. I told the doctor any time after election day so I ‘m having it on the 9th. Thanks for giving me something else to be concerned about.

    Liked by 2 people

    • 😳. So sorry! But I’ve had surgery 10 times. And while I can honestly say that I fart mustard gas, I have never even warmed up a surgeon’s hands.

      Good luck with it — waiting is always the worst part for me. (That and the stupid things people say 🙄)

      Liked by 2 people

  12. OMG this is crazy! One more thing to add to the long list of what could go wrong, so patient is aware before signing the consent form. Stay away from beans and roughage for 3-5 days prior to procedure. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • I spend my life studying things that go wrong — I don’t need any more. I’m hoping it is made up, because, shit. Even if you have no food in your system, you have gas. Don’t ask how I know that 😉

      Liked by 2 people

  13. I’m reading this after eating beans for lunch. I’m really glad I don’t have an operation scheduled for later.

    Liked by 2 people

  14. When I was a teenager, a friend of mine and I spent a few hours trying to light our farts. It was frustrating at the time, but now I’m glad we weren’t successful.

    Liked by 2 people

  15. anniedm778

    Perhaps that is why here, in the US, one is put on a restricted eating schedule before surgery.

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Holy mother of pink ! I didn’t know farting could be so dangerous. * and I’m not making light of this incident *

    Liked by 1 person

    • I always KNEW that farting was dangerous. I could personally kill with some of mine.

      I am actually hoping that the story is made up — that way I/we can laugh at it guilt free!

      Liked by 1 person

  17. I read about this, too, but I was wondering how true the story was. It seems so unlikely. Patients must fart all the time–wouldn’t you think that would be taken into account?

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Oh hurrah for small mercies……… I’m just weeing blue!

    Liked by 1 person

  19. I could totally see that happening to me.

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Holy shit! (Or gas, as the case may be).

    Liked by 4 people

  21. OH NO! This could be the very reason why I have feared hospitals since birth!

    Liked by 1 person

  22. Gosh, I just worry about peeing and pooping on the operating table. Now I have worry about gas too?

    Liked by 2 people

    • Long ago I gave up any semblance of pride when it comes to doctors, nurses, hospitals and other medical facilities. I figure these things are my only weapons against the nasty things they end up doing to me.

      Liked by 1 person

  23. Well, that’s a fine “how-do-you-do”. Whoddathunk?


    Liked by 1 person

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