In her teens and twenties, my mom was a singer. She had a lovely, haunting voice and great style. By the time I came along and was growing up, Mom mostly sang while she did chores. She always seemed to have her hands in the sink with a load of dirty dishes from our good Irish Catholic family of five.
Mom was a Connelly and her mother a Kennedy. Yes, we’re related. But then, Ireland is a small island; everyone is really related to everyone else.
So on St. Paddy’s day, here is the closest thing I could find to my mother singing her very favorite song.
Happy St. Patrick’s Day up there, Mom. I hope your Irish eyes are smiling and dancing up there with Dad.
I just don’t get it. And I’m hoping someone can help me out here. You see, my parents left the Catholic Church when I was only 10. So there is a whole lot about religion that I just don’t get. (Yeah, it’s their fault.)
I got the basics. I don’t kill people or steal or do other bad things. I love my neighbor, but not too much. I’m involved with and engaged in my community, but just not in an organized religion sort of way. Lack of church membership doesn’t make me a bad person, although I realize that some people would argue with that. I can handle being on my own should “The Rapture” come to pass.
The thing is, a vocal minority of those folks are really getting all up in my face these days. They are bouncing up and down and crying “religious freedom” all day and night. And I don’t know about you, but I think the word “freedom” has been hijacked. Whenever someone tries to tell me that they are “protectingfreedom,” well, it’s more likely that he or she is trying to take away some of myfreedoms. And yours.
Yup. I’m getting the feeling that “Freedom” is becoming less and less free, right here at home. That noise is Thomas Jefferson and the other founding fathers rolling in their graves. You remember, those cool old guys who set up a government with a clear separation of Church and State? I’m pretty sure they’re ticked.
So here is my issue. My problem. My query. When God created man (and women), however that happened, He did it in His image right? Isn’t that what the bible says? I’m pretty sure that I got that part right.
These guys do look alike, don't they? But is beauty only skin deep? (Google Image)
Then here’s my question: Was that image complete? Whole hog? I mean, did that “image” include the brain? And if so, doesn’t that make using one’s brain “Godly” or “Godlike” or, at a minimum, “Good”? Doesn’t that mean that to NOT use one’s brain is ungodly? And shouldn’t we use our God-given brains to make things better for God’s creatures, including our fellow man?
You see why I’m confused. Maybe you are too.
I just can’t figure out why some folks apparently think that we were created in God’s image, but only on theoutside. On the inside, well, I guess we’re just created in someone else’s image. I guess the only interior options would be the fish in the seas or the animals on the land. That just doesn’t seem Kosher, now, does it?
Spencer Tracy's Father Flanagan doesn't look at all like Rick Santorum -- Google Image
If we were created in God’s image, inside and out, shouldn’t that mean that the wonders created by mankind are God’s work, too? Isn’t that, well, logical?
So I just don’t understand the folks who hate science, who disdain learning, and who seem to want to go back to times when the folks organizing religion weren’t exactly like Father Flanagan.
Because it seems to me that Rick Santorum, the Virginia Legislature and the GOP in general look and act a lot like these guys:
Fun Times with the Spanish Inquisition -- Google Image
Hey, hey, don’t leave women out! Those sluts.
Don't want to leave the little woman out of the Inquisition! (Google Image)
Because if these “religious freedom” folks have their way, “Freedom” will, in fact, be just another word for “nothin’ left to lose.”
Perhaps I should have taken more philosophy courses and fewer writing ones. Because I just don’t get it.
A couple of years ago, I was corresponding with a high school classmate of mine about a reunion. Hugh had left the east and was living in New Mexico.
“What I really miss is the green,” he said to me in an email. “I’m thirsty for it.”
Well, it was spring, and that evening I was walking my dog Cooper by the river. It was hazy, but very green and bluebells were blossoming. Thinking of my friend Hugh, I snapped a cell-phone picture and sent it off to him.
It was actually a nice picture, somewhere between a color and a black and white, because the light was diffused. I liked the picture, and made it my computer’s background photo. About two weeks later, while talking with a client, I realized that there was a bonus to this picture. There on the right, was Cooper. Pooping.
Today is Cooper’s 14th birthday. We didn’t think he would make it this long, as he has been in poor health for the last couple of years. He’s always made me laugh, usually at myself.
My mother-in-law, Helen, just celebrated her 86th birthday! She is the last of our parents, John’s and mine, and we feel lucky to have her around. For her age she’s doing quite well. She still lives independently and does pretty well with some help from us and even more from John’s sister who lives much closer.
As she ages, naturally she has more health issues. But she is very independent and doesn’t want any of us along when she goes to the doctor. It won’t be long before we start insisting though, because whenever she goes for a checkup or for a problem, we end up completely confused and can’t help because, well, she likes to keep things private.
In the last year, though, she’s had a few procedures that, while not too terribly invasive, still seemed over the top. Unnecessary. Expensive, but covered by Medicare and Medi-gap insurance.
Now remember, I am a bit of a cheerleader for doctors. I have wonderful ones and they have improved my life immensely. I work with doctors, I have friends who are doctors. I am really familiar with the system and how things work.
So I have to say that I was taken aback when I read a recent article in the Wall Street Journal:
The article was written by Ken Murray. DoctorKen Murray. Naturally as an all-too frequent patient/medical geek, I was intrigued. The gist of the article is summed up by this quote:
What’s unusual about doctors is not how much treatment they get compared with most Americans, but how little. They know exactly what is going to happen, they know the choices, and they generally have access to any sort of medical care that they could want. But they tend to go serenely and gently.
Oh.
No tubes. No chemotherapy. No machines. Gently and serenely. Well, whodda thunk it?
I know for a fact that doesn’t happen in the hospital. They know for a fact that doesn’t happen in a hospital. If it did, medical costs would not be so, well, costly. You’ve read the stats, so I won’t go there. You’re welcome.
My sister Beth, who was a nurse, had suffered a stroke that, among other things, led to acute kidney failure requiring years of dialysis. Beth had been having problems for a couple of months when she suddenly took a severe turn for the worse, and she was in terrible pain. Her sons were unable to help her and took her, against her will, to the hospital, where she lapsed into a coma. But not before she was placed on all kinds of machines, respirators, monitors, dialysis machines, the works. But she had really already gone. None of that expensive equipment was really necessary. None of it changed the outcome. Only the drugs made her more comfortable.
Selfishly, part of me is glad they put her on those machines, because it gave me enough time to get to her bedside and be there at the end. She would have been glad to know I was there, but not glad of the expensive and hopeless treatment she received. That is not at all what she would have wanted. Would you?
So when I read this article I realized it was time to add an important question to the list I ask all doctors whenever I go, or whenever I go with someone I am trying to help:
“Hey, Doc? What would you do if you were the patient?”
It’s happened in the wake of the tragic death of singer Whitney Houston. Or maybe it happened in the wake of CNN’s 4-day, 24-hour per day marathon coverage of her funeral which included an estimated 5,392,911 renditions of Whitney singing “I Will Always Love You.” Whichever it was, I was delighted to see that our society has truly stepped up to the plate. We are, thanks to Whitney, tackling the demons in our midst.
Starting with the one that has been keeping me up nights for years:
FiftyFourandAHalf 