It happened again today. I’m sure it’s happened to you, too. Repeatedly. And Word Press, you need to do something about it — right away!
What happened was this: I was taking a nano-break at work, reading a post by Year-Struck that I did not “LIKE.” Oh it was good. Beautiful in fact, well written, and heart breaking. But no, I didn’t “LIKE” it in the Word Press sort of way.
What do you do then, when a piece is sad and beautiful and makes you want to make the writer feel better for getting it off their chest, for sharing, for, well, giving their story? Me, I stress out completely. And I don’t “LIKE” it.
I have puzzled about this before. When I first started blogging, I would read another’s blog and hit “LIKE” and then leave a lame comment saying,
“Well, I didn’t really‘LIKE’ it, but I clicked “LIKE” because, well, I needed to do something. But I really am sorry that you were hit on the head by a meteorite…” And I’d trail off. I’d feel inadequate. As if there was something else I could have done.
You know, Word Press, sometimes I just don’t want to tell somebody who has told me deep, dark stuff through their blog that I “LIKE” it. It doesn’t make sense. It is illogical. It is an oxy-moron to “LIKE” something “UN-LIKE-able.” Because the post was bad. Or sad. Or hard.
And sometimes, Word Press, I just don’t have time to write what I mean to say in a clever manner when:
- A blogger just told me the worst thing that has ever happened in their life and they still have the scars to prove it (hey, I “LIKE” it!);
- A blogger just told me that they have a terminal disease and they will die a horrible death, soon, but that I shouldn’t worry — other bloggers will survive (hey, I “LIKE” it!);
- My head has just exploded from the stress of not wanting to press “LIKE” but having no alternative.
Really, truly, I want to scream,
All right, I “LIKE” it!
But I don’t. “LIKE” it, that is. I want something else.
So for the months I’ve been blogging, I’ve puzzled. I’ve noodled. I’ve even gone so far as to put on my thinking cap. And you know things are pretty serious when that happens.
My first choice for an alternative was
S*cks!
But then I thought of my audience. We are all basically insecure writers. And I don’t think that everyone will TAKE that moniker in the manner I’m suggesting. Then again, some folks won’t USE this button in an empathetic manner. But that’s, of course, highly unlikely. We are all sweet and kind here in the ‘sphere.
Besides, I also realized that if I continue using naughty language on my blog, my dream of one day being Fresh Pressed will go down in a blaze of language my mother wouldn’t “LIKE.”
I continued to puzzle till my puzzler was sore. Until I thought of another option:
Sending Kisses to you!
Doesn’t that just make you feel good all over? But then, some of us are married and our spouses wouldn’t approve even of cyber kisses. So that won’t work.
What is a blogger to do?????
Word Press, we need an alternative.
May I humbly suggest you create the following alternative to the “LIKE” button:
The 54-1/2 Button
Click on it when your heart goes out to the blogger, when you think that their writing is strong and powerful but tells a story that is not necessarily fun or funny and you don’t “LIKE” them being in pain. Click on it when you think that a lovely photo of the shore will ease their pain.
Or click on it when you just want to confuse folks because they will have no clue what it means. I “LIKE” doing that.
FiftyFourandAHalf 
I love the s*ck button!
😀
Atlas.
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Thanks, Atlas. Sometimes it is all you can say!
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Thanks OG! I think that I had lost my “follow” of your blog. I couldn’t figure out who I was missing! So a special thank you for commenting. I clicked + and am back. Good luck with your fitness effort!
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A friend of mine always used to say, “I hear ya…” Sort of says it all!!
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Word Press doesn’t seem to be biting either on my suggestion of a 54-1/2 button OR any of the others. Perhaps I should communicate with the blog host via snail mail!
Thanks for your sweet comments about the blog, Janice — you’re always so kind.
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Dammit, now I really want a 54 1/2 button. Can’t we lobby somebody for one? What a great idea, woman! Like Christyb, I need a REALLY LIKE button for everything you write. Great stuff!
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For your post, I didn’t just ‘like’ it, I REALLY ‘like’ it!!
christyb
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Thanks Christy! I just went over to your blog and found your Tune for Tuesday: http://poeticparfait.wordpress.com/2012/01/10/tunes-for-tuesday-jet-lag/#more-144
I “LOVED” it!
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Thanks Elyse! I enjoyed the concept for your post and the way it was written as well. Nice to see you on my page too!
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Thanks Christy!
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I guess that’s one of the superficial elements of the virtual world. I’ve liked posts that I haven’t a clue in understanding. I guess I’m just fake in that way. 🙂 On another note, I guess liking in the case of a sad tale is showing support, like a pat on the back or “I get it” sort of thing.
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There is a superficial element in the virtual world? I am shocked, shocked! And yes, it is a pat on the back and that’s why I often click it anyway. But why is there only the Kool-aid. Why not another option?
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hahhaahaha…. I hit the like button!
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That’s OK, Lori. Just when I admit to actually being Bernie Madoff, then you should refrain!
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I could help but, like, “like” this. Y’know? Both in general and the creepy WordPress way.
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Awww, shucks. Thanks. And thanks for stopping by. I’m looking forward to visiting Boggleton Drive!
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Love it! That’s how I feel about facebook – they need a dislike or ‘praying for you’ or ‘save the drama’ … button — especially for the literalists out there 🙂 Angie
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Hi Angie, Welcome and thanks.
When I saw you subscribed to my blog, I checked out one of your posts (only one, I’m trying to get to work sometime this morning!) and loved it — http://doyoumeanwhatiknow.wordpress.com/2011/12/28/no-gifts-will-be-returned-in-this-house/
And you gave me my next post. Cause I don’t “LIKE” it when folks return gifts!
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I dare not hit the like button in the midst of this discussion……..glad you brought this up!
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The weird thing is the “Like” button works for little ditties like this. When someone writes something heart-wrenching, well, I want to support, appreciate, send my love, something but not “LIKE.” I loved your last post which is here, in case anybody missed it. Ohh, did I hit “LIKE”????
http://winsomebella.wordpress.com/2012/01/10/916/
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Here is my crazy. I usually hit “like” right before I finish my comment. I hesitate to “like” something first and then comment because sometimes I get sidetracked by reading others’ comments and by the time I actually comment, it may be 25 minutes later. I never want a blogger to notice this time lapse in their email inbox and think I spent 25 minutes perfectly crafting my comment. Because then I’d seem really crazy. Okay, wait, now that I think of it, does that make me even crazier that I even thought all of this out? Yes it does. The End.
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Angie, we love you because you’re crazy. It doesn’t matter which quirk of yours we are looking at, we are thinking “Angie is crazy.” So be comfortable hitting the “Like” or the “reply” button any old time!
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Awwww…I feel so accepted. It’s like a big warm hug with a “like” thumbs up next to it.
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Angie, I know this may come as a shock to you (or maybe not) but I do the same thing. Once I “liked” one of Paul’s posts but then the kids needed me for some crisis and I had to leave the computer. Then I’d finally come back about 8 hours later and leave a comment and I’d think, I hope he doesn’t think I spent 8 hours coming up with a clever reply (even though, it seems I probably should)
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That’s awesome, Darla! Now after 8 hours I would be more along the lines of thinking, Paul is going to think I love his blog so much that after I read it and ‘liked’ it, I came back again later and lingered on it before finally deciding what to say. On my way to 40 and I’m still trying to pretend I’m too cool for school — and everyone knows I’m not.
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Darla and Angie, I’m pretty sure everyone spends hours working on the comments the put on my blog. Hours re-reading and figuring out just how many “ha”-s they should leave…
And Angie, you are way too cool for school. Always will be. No matter what they all said about you.
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Awwww, shucks, Darla. I’m afraid that I cannot hire you yet. I’m working on it though, so keep sucking up!
I do the “LIKE” button the same way you do, except for the kid stuff. In my house, the kid has a better computer than Mom or Dad. And how do you manage to be Blogger Extraordinaire when everyone is fighting for the one computer. Damn, you ROCK!
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Well now between us both sucking up, we should go in business together pronto!
Have you been Freshly Pressed yet? If not, when you are–can I say I knew you when?
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Well I loved this post, I love all of your posts! I was going to suggest the link to k8edid’s creative “button” post but someone beat me to it.
I usually click “like” mainly because I am always living in fear one of my kids will need something as soon as I start to type out a comment. (they usually do and it’s usually one of them wanting to get on our only computer!) so I figure a “like” is better than nothing.
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I usually only hit the ‘like’ button on recipes I want to find again quickly and easily. If I want to acknowledge a well written post, I normally leave a reply.
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You can find recipes easily if you hit the “LIKE” button? That would be so helpful if I ever cooked any more. But I have shelves full of cookbooks, so I am not sure I need any more recipes to not make!
I agree that a real comment (or a rambling one like this reply) is MUCH better. But sometimes, there is no time!
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Thanks MJ! I “LIKE” hearing from you, whether it is via comment or buttons.
And thank you for the Candle Lighter Award. I guess this means you’re not going to find my Oscars for me, eh? :). I appreciate your thoughtfulness in sending it my way.
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I’m gonna say “like” or “really like” or “love” this or “can I be her” on this post. Well done, sister!
BTW:
Congratulations! It’s official – The Academy, okay, mj monaghan, has recognized your wonderful blog with the Candle Lighter Award!
Here’s the envelope with more details: http://wp.me/p1JIsL-cQ!
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My, the following you have.
And thank you for making me think. I’ll remember you in my won’t.
Now, to the point. Maybe the superior site would allow for customized ‘like’ buttons/ per user – public or private, whatever, to allow the reader to comment on what she/he liked about your post specifically. For example:
‘interesting information’,
‘kindred spirit’,
‘eloquent’,
‘get a professional’,
‘you made me laugh so hard I peed’,
etc.
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“Get a Professional” and “I peed” are particularly good options. I would consider them were I to design my own blog theme software. But that can only happen at your next visit!
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Wouldn’t it be great if wp could design buttons like they offer up widgets/badges and we could incorporate ones that fit our message, theme, style, personality? Great post!
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Thanks Georgette. And what a great idea you have for Word Press — themes with individualized buttons. Like our banners, only smaller!
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I, too, have mixed feelings about the ‘like’ button, but I like your post. I didn’t hit the ‘like’ button because I’m making this comment and I dislike redundancy, but love snarkiness.
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I also like redundant snarkiness :). But hitting “like” on this one would be more or less appropriate, assuming it is true. I didn’t for example just admit to being a serial killer. Then “like” would be bad, bad, bad.
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I like it. 🙂 Even once one of my earlier post, where i considered my self as a loser; Renee author of the blog “Writing Feemail” wrote the same thing in my comment box. She wrote that, she did n’t want to hit the like button, where i considered my self as a loser. But it touches her so much, so she clicked on it. And your post turned that thought so beautifully in to words. Let’s hope WordPress is listening it. 🙂 You really have a gift to turn real instances and thoughts in to beautiful posts.
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Thanks, Arindam, what a nice thing to say.. And what’s a blogger to without different words to choose from!
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As attested to by Arindam, have had similar circumstances arise. ‘Appreciate’ is a great one as is ‘understand’. It’s sad when the attempt to comment gets overtaken by need to explain. Yikes.
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Thanks Renee! I agree that we need an alternative. Like is too limiting!
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I “like” the thought behind this. I’d really like an “I understand” button.
🙂
MJ
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That would be a great option! Thanks. Hey, Word Press ….
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I don’t use the like buttons a lot, only because I want to try to say something to the creator of the site. Sometimes it’s hard to find the time or words, but I know I find them more of a comfort than the “like” button. You’ve probably lit a fire under WP and there are design techs burning the midnight oil right now in an attempt to design new buttons. I Like that.
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Often I do both, hit “LIKE” and leave a comment. But sometimes I want to think before I comment, or I don’t have time, or I am in awe of what I’ve read — substance and quality of writing. So I’d love a little something to let someone know I’ve been there and read it.
But I don’t think that WP knows I’m around … and if they haven’t added buttons since this post came out — http://k8edid.wordpress.com/2011/11/15/more-wordpress-buttons-id-like-to-see/
then I think we’re unlikely to see my “54-1/2” button any time soon!
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That totally makes sense. Perhaps the “vote” part will do. But I agree, there’s should be a more sensitive way to emphatize with someone who is going through a rough time. Perhaps something like, click _ inspiring, _ wonderful, _ amazing; All of which I’ll click in each of your post! Have a great day.
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Why thanks, IT — you are too kind. But I’m pretty sure I don’t live up to those monikers, or not very often, anyway. I think “DOH” fits most of my posts better!
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If you read it, it doesn’t matter if you click LIKE or not. It doesn’t even matter if you don’t read it. The ‘sphere is a strange beast of a half million people puking out their thoughts, and some of them are unlikeable. (Like this comment).
Good post.
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Les, your comments are NEVER un-LIKEable. In fact, I’m looking for the comment version of “LIKE” but all I can find is this :).
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☀ Sun.
♡ Heart.
or…
Maybe a four-leaf clover to ‘wish’ good fortune in the future?
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All of the above. Or any of the above. Thanks for the suggestions.
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Hi,
It would be nice to have a bit of a choice on the buttons, I have to say I do like the idea of DOH. 😀
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Thanks Mag’s. “DOH” would often work for me! And I think that Nancy (NotQuiteOld)’s suggestion of an “Appreciate” button would work the rest of the time.
Problem solved. Word Press, are you listening?
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I understand what you’re saying, Elyse, but I think it’s completely possible to like someone’s post (the writing, the heart, the soul) even though the subject matter may be sad or even tragic. Don’t be concerned about hurting the writer’s feelings. They’re writing to get that “like” button pushed. I think. Listen, I went to see the movie, The Help, with two female friends. Three white chicks goin’ to the movies. As we left the theater, I said how wonderful it was. It had felt like a genuine privilege to see that movie. I laughed; I cried; I cheered. And, at the end, I applauded. It was wonderful. I LIKED IT. Nay, I LOVED IT. One of my friends agreed whole-heartedly. The other friend was appalled at both of us. She said, “I don’t see how you can say you enjoyed a movie about such a horrible subject. It’s terrible how those people were treated!” Well, duh. That was the point, but she was missing the point. That’s what the movie was ABOUT. The point was “We shall overcome. We won’t give up. We will STAND up.” It was marvelous. And I hope, come Oscar time, enough Academy voters will have “LIKED” that movie to give it some gold. To Elyse, and others who are worried about the LIKE button, I’d say ‘don’t overthink it.’ The LIKE button is about saying you liked the writing. It means, ‘Wow, your writing is awesome,’ and that’s exactly what the writer is hoping for. It’s just my opinion, worth less than the price of a cup of coffee, but I say LIKE away to your heart’s content. If it’s true that you appreciated the writing, then LIKE it! The writer will know that you’re commenting on the writing and not on the sadness or tragedy.
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I see your point, and I understand that folks are not offended. “Like” is an acknowledgement. One who has been writing about her mother’s passing even specifically says “hit the LIKE button.”
I would just like a choice to quickly say something that is less like a smiley face!
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How about a “better you than me” button. Oh wait…that may be a tad bit insensitive.
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Oooh, Snap! Yes, that would be a good one for the snarky among us. And you and I are firmly in that category!
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I don’t like this post Elyse, I love this post, but had to hit the Like button because there is no Love button option to hit. Of course if a 54 1/2 button were an option, I’d love that. No, wait, I’d Like that.
Wordpress should fix this issue. I’d like that too.
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Thanks Lisa! And welcome back to the ‘sphere. I’ve missed you.
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I like appreciate, too. Or you can suggest “I hear ya'”… 🙂
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That works, too!
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Looked for the Elyse button but didn’t see it so let me just say Amen! sister;)
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Thanks, PW. And yes, an “Elyse” button would serve all these functions nicely. Of course, no one could spell it properly!
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I genuinely like this post and you are absolutely right, there should be some alternative when there is a particularly heartfelt post. I like Nancy’s idea for “appreciate.”
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Appreciate would be terrific. “Like”? Not so much!
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I was going to like this but then I was too scared because of the whole message here.
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I’m not really the scary sort. I might just be a wee-bit sarcastic. Thanks for visiting!
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Gotta like this. Seriously, good points.
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I cannot argue with philosopher mouse. Nope. Not even going to try. I will, however go over and see what’s happening in the hedge! Thanks for stopping by!
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I feel the same way, and have experienced the same dilemma. When you hit the “like” button, it feels like you’re putting a smiley face on someone’s blog. Maybe just a little heart button, or better yet, some of the buttons that k8edid suggested on her blog at http://k8edid.wordpress.com/2011/11/15/more-wordpress-buttons-id-like-to-see/
I really thought she should have been Freshly Pressed for that post.
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I hadn’t seen that one — and you’re right. It’s a classic. Now I feel the need for a “DOH” button!
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I would appreciate a button that says “Appreciate”.
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“Appreciate” would be perfect. YearStricken (below) mentioned a much better post on this same subject — I guess I need a button for “It’s been Done!”
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