Spread ‘Em!

At last.  Finally.  Well, I must say it’s been years since it’s happened in front of anybody but my husband.  So I’ve decided to drive around until I get pulled over.  And then, I can be strip searched!  I am so excited.  I just can’t wait.

Really!  The Supreme Court just decided I could be.  And I don’t have to do anything at all.  I can be pulled over if I don’t signal a turn, or if I don’t stop at a stop sign, or if I ship heroin from Coast to Coast.  I can get pulled over if I didn’t do anything at all.  Yup, it doesn’t matter a bit.  It doesn’t matter whether I commit a misdemeanor or am a serial killer.  Or a terrorist.  It doesn’t matter if I haven’t done a thing!  Those handsome guys can strip search me.  And it’s OK, because I am a big CHIPS fan:

Wanna know what I’m talking about?

Apparently you didn’t hear about the Supreme Court’s latest ruling.  By a 5-4 verdict the Supreme Court decided that anyone stopped by the police for any reason can be strip searched.  Anyone at any time.  Regardless of the charges against them.  They can be hauled into the police station and told to drop ‘em and spread ‘em.

So, if you are stopped by a policeman/woman for any reason whatsoever, you can now be strip searched.  For any reason at all.  Or no reason at all.  Even if you’re not the driver of the car.  That was the situation with the subject of this ruling — he was a passenger.

Have you ever:

  • Missed a stop sign?
  • Exceeded the speed limit?
  • Forgotten a parking ticket?

Do you have:

  • A teen-age daughter?
  • A teen-age son?
  • A sense of personal privacy?
  • A fear of standing naked in front of policemen/women?

Too bad.

I am SOOOOOOOOO glad everyone is protecting my liberties.

My liberty to stand naked in a jail for forgetting my turn signal.

77 Comments

Filed under Elections, Family, Hypocrisy, Law, Politics, Stupidity, Traffic

77 responses to “Spread ‘Em!

  1. Oh. My. God.
    I am voting Socialist in this election. Enough is enough!

  2. It is really getting scary, isn’t it.

    I AM TIRED OF WRITING ABOUT CRAZINESS IN POLITICS!

  3. I’m really into losing my liberties, as well. Super cool. I love the idea of a big brother watching me, nanny states, and big bloated government! Yay!

    • You know, this Supreme Court is really dangerous. They have allowed us all to drop our pants on a dime, they decided a presidential election and they gave us Citizens United.

  4. Roadside attractions? Geez? What’s next?

    • Hmm, I hadn’t thought of them doing it on the roadside. Wouldn’t that be cool. Or possibly COLD.

      But no, they take you to the police station. Then they can abuse their power/probe you.

  5. Could all Canadian bloggers please send the real estate market details, and neighborhood suggestions for a snarky NYCer to move too? Because I’m pretty sure I’m jut one or two bits of jackassery away from relocating.
    Not that I have anything against nudity. It’s just better when, you know, it’s voluntary.

  6. Gross. We live in a crazy world.

  7. Our courts just legalized prostitution, what’s the point.

    • So there are crazy judges in NZ, too. I guess it’s not just in the water.

      Although I think legalizing something people do anyway makes some sense. Perhaps that’s what our Supreme Court was thinking: hey, sometimes police overstep their bounds, let’s let them!

  8. What the HELL is going on in this country?

    • I don’t know, but I am getting tired of being frustrated with all these folks who shout about the Constitution, the flag and our LIBERTIES all the while helping themselves to them.

  9. I feel like America is turning into an ever worsening nightmare, that we all just can’t seem to wake up from. I wrote an April fools post yesterday supposedly as a prank to convince readers that I had made up my mind to move to Australia, but the unwritten truth is that I’m really starting to seriously consider leaving this country because it’s becoming such a socially economically and politically toxic environment here. If the US Supreme Court destroys health care reform in June, I think I’m going to get ready to leave,

  10. Huh? I have to do some research. We need to post a link. I think the majority of justices need to get the Glitter E. Yaynus for this.

    • Justice Kennedy, who wrote the opinion, said that the police might have stopped Tim McVey and/or one of the 9/11 terrorists had they had this authority “back in the day.”

      What I can’t figure out is why Kennedy thinks that Tim McVey could have hidden a TRUCK LOAD of fertilizer bomb under his shirt, or that one of the 9/11 terrorists had a box cutter up his butt (wouldn’t it then have been considered a “butt cutter”).

      Crazy.

  11. This is great news. I’m so tired of having to go all the way to the airport to be strip searched.

  12. And this crew of “supreme” decision makers are suppose to the brightest of the lightbulbs…..they are by far the most frightening crew and they really need to be disbanded.

  13. Michelle Gillies

    Once again my American friends get the benefits before we Canadians! It just isn’t fair. We should have the right to be stripped searched at the side of the road by officers of the law as well.
    Maybe I’ll just go for a road trip to the US of A. ;-)

    • Well, yes, Michelle, we Americans are WAY ahead of you.

      The police cannot strip search you by the side of the road, though (I think I wasn’t clear). They get to take you in, without probable cause, and hold you in a cell where they get to strip search you. The man who filed this particular law suit was not even the driver of the car — so they should have had no rights to take him in at all.

      Scary stuff.

  14. Hi,
    That is just ridiculous, who are these idiots that made this law, honestly do they live in the same country as you, what on earth is going on?

    • The folks who ruled on this, the Supreme Court, doesn’t make the laws. In the U.S. that’s done by Congress. But when law suits happen, the Supreme Court is the final arbiter of the outcome — they have the last word on whether this behavior is permissible. They decided it is. Now that is the law of the land unless Congress changes the law. Not likely with the jokers in there now.

      Uhghghghg

  15. Interesting that the conservative wing is about personal liberties and protection against government intrusion …. EXCEPT when it comes to law enforcement.

    For anyone interested, the case is Florence v. County of Burlington, No. 10-945. … and here’s a post from the SCOTUS Blog. http://www.scotusblog.com/2012/04/opinion-analysis-routine-jail-strip-searches-ok/#more-142415

  16. I think, the next time I’m stopped, I shall just start removing my clothing. Just to save them some time, you know…. or to scare them off…. :P

  17. what if I’m already driving around naked…won’t that confuse them????

  18. Are you SURE this isn’t some sick twisted April Fools joke?

    • According to the Supreme Court Blog that AFrankAngle linked to, the specifics of this case are a bit more complicated than the reports I read (NYTimes and MSNBC) indicated. And a bit more complicated than when I got ticked off and picked up my laptop.

      But the result will be the same.

      I wish it were an April Fools joke — but I don’t think these folks have much of a sense of humor.

      • That is insane. Truly scary.

        By the way, I dropped by again to say that I was totally kidding from the start with the caption thing, you know that, right? I could never be mad at anyone. (although I’m a super miffed at the Supreme Court right now) I was just teasin’ and I knew you were, too. Sometimes my fake indignation doesn’t come across as well as I’d hoped. Plus I thought it would be a great chance to post hijack on Peg’s AND Angie’s blog. Hope you are home from work just chillin’ now. Have a grrrrrreat week, Elyse!

        • Hi Darla,
          Yeah, I figured you were jerkin’ my chain, and Peg’s and Angie’s. You’re just like that, Darla. Then again, so am I. So is Peg. So is Angie. Perhaps we can team up and lift elevators or something useful with this chain yankin’ that we’ve got going.

          Checking comments, however, was a bit odd because I was answering in those little blobs at the top of the page — the ones that lose your comments 9 times out of 10. So I was a bit confused, but that often happens when I’m at work! When I am at work working hard. Very. Earning every penny for my company. A valued employee that no one would ever consider firing ….

  19. Terrible. Bad for the one strip searched. Great for the dirty cop.

  20. In the link provided by Frank, I saw that people could only be searched if they are being put in a jail cell with other people. Don’t they do that already?

    • It depends on the jurisdiction, I believe. Or it did until now.

      There are also a few other things that are confusing. Frank’s link indicates that Mr. Florence, the subject of this lawsuit was the driver. Other articles I’ve read say that he was only a passenger. If I am a passenger and you are pulled over for not stopping at a light or a stop sign, I am under no legal obligation to show the police ID or anything — unless they have probable cause (pot smoke wafting, etc.) He had done nothing wrong. There was an incorrect warrant, and he reportedly produced evidence to the police of the fact that the warrant was cleared. He was hauled into jail and strip searched twice.

      The Fourth Amendment prohibits unlawful search and seizure. It is really part of the heart of American tradition, and a big part of what the Revolution was fought — against the British tradition of warrantless seizures. John Adams was quoted as saying it sparked the Revolution. Well, he was quoted by Wikipedia, but I have heard that before.

      This Supreme Court seems to like to pick and choose on issues of Constitutionality, if you ask me.

      Me, I’d like to get rid of the 2nd Amendment and keep the 4th.

  21. All in the name of fear…What would the Framers think of this? I live about 25 miles from the Canadian border. I wonder if they’d mind if I took up residency…

  22. Ack! Really? Did you know you are now among my trusted news sources?

    I don’t believe a word of what anyone else says.

  23. I’m just going to have to put mousetraps all over my body or I should say, more mousetraps.

  24. Rodrigo

    The easiest solution is to just not break the law. 0=)

    • You make all mothers proud with that statement. But sometimes that’s not enough. The man who was the subject of the strip search was just a passenger, with a past that had been cleaned up.

      This is not a good development.

      You keeping your nose clean, however, is!

  25. 35 years ago this would not have bothered me in the least. I might have asked for music and a pole (tips too).

    Perhaps this is really just a Rush thing, we should all video and post for his enjoyment?

    Gad, when does this end? Really, when.

    • You know, I tried to put a clip of Demi Moore in the movie where she was a stripper, but I just couldn’t work it in while I was steaming…

      I don’t know when this will end. And I frankly cannot believe they are stomping on every Amendment but the damn 2nd.

  26. I think I need to re-read 1984 to prepare myself for what’s next.

  27. GOF

    I think there are some little-known provisions within the law, or lack of laws preventing it in this country too which has enabled police to get away with unjustified strip-searches. Sadly a very small percentage of our police officers abuse their powers and they need to be weeded out.

    • I agree. And I agree that it is a small minority. What this court decision does is legitimize bad behavior. Bad plan.

      Hope the new baby is doing well!

  28. Is it really happening in that part of that world! I wish the police would strip search those people who made this rule. There is a Indian movie, which I watched few years earlier had similar concept to this post of yours. Although this post is a funny one and the concept of that movie was, how a young man’s life who was studying in New York, got affected after he jailed & strip searched without no valid reason.
    Great post!

    • Thanks Arindam.

      I’m afraid the answer is apparently, yes, it is happening. People are forgetting that by giving into fears we all lose. Sad state of affairs.

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  30. After speaking with my hubby on this, these searches have been going on all along. It seems the supreme court finally made an official ruling. These searches are for anyone entering a jail cell for whatever reason. In the holding area they are searched and then strip searched in private. It’s the way it has to be to check for contraband regardless again of the reason they are put in jail. This searches are to entering jail like weapon searches are to entering government buildings/airplanes.

  31. They were going on in many places but not in ALL places. They were also not sanctioned by the Supreme Court. In most places, strip searches were not done on non violent traffic offenders unless there was reason to believe that they were smuggling contraban like drugs or weapons. Now you can be strip searched for running a stop sign. I think this is going WAY too far.

Play nice, please.

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